


Teach me how to love (YOU)

by mirkwood131



Series: EXO Central [3]
Category: BLACKPINK (Band), EXO (Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Boys Kissing, Byun Baekhyun & Do Kyungsoo | D.O Friendship, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Humor, M/M, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-19
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-04 02:10:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 32,167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12760962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mirkwood131/pseuds/mirkwood131
Summary: The highschool!au in which Baekhyun is trying to make his hot math teacher fall in love with him. Or in bed with him. Doesn't matter.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm quite excited about this one, hehe. I honestly love writing from Baekhyun's perspective, but more so, I love Baekhyun as a character. He's so much fun.
> 
> enjoy :)

Byun Baekhyun wouldn’t consider himself the popular type of high schooler, but not the introverted one, either. Where he stands is somewhere in the middle, in a place that he could call his own: the obnoxious kind. (Or at least this is what everybody has been telling him since he was a toddler).

But being in a special spot of his own, has, as many would probably guess, perks like no other. (Or non-perks, but Baekhyun would never want to admit that). As nobody takes him seriously, not even him, it is rather difficult to one as himself to actually make an effort to be more mature. In fact, Byun Baekhyun can be a rather serious person, but fate has decided that it is not the road he should take. So, in his everyday life, he has successfully adopted the role of the class and house’s obnoxious clown.

And Byun Baekhyun would say that it is fantastic and everything he has ever wanted, but many of us would still know that it is a lie. Which wouldn’t stop him from saying those words, because in his rather small world, it doesn’t matter anymore what others think of him. Or what he thinks either.

The lines between his real self and the fabricated one have become so blurred, that it’s even painfully hard for him to tell them apart.

Even though a self-proclaimed clown’s day might sound more exciting than it is in reality, his everyday life starts with the pink, elephant clock on his night stand being thrown with an extraterrestrial force exactly on the bright lime rug in front of his bed. Over the school years, his precision has become unbeatable and not to this day, has the clock showed any sign of giving up on its life.

After 10 minutes of constant groaning and covering his head with the pillow and duvet until he feels asphyxiated, he finally stands up from his bed and heads, with eyes still closed, to the kitchen. Because food is essential to any reputable clown.

For the past almost 4 years of torturous high school, he has always found his _omelette du fromage_ on the table, with the adjacent little sister eating her cereal on the seat next to his.

Mother never to be found at 7:36:25 in the morning, only the father, trying to shave in the bathroom, but only managing to add a few more razor cuts to his impressive collection. Byun Baekhyun’s mother has gotten used to saying at every family reunion that Baekhyun is exactly like his dad, and that Lucy, his sister, is exactly like her mother.

When Byun Baekhyun finally sits at the table, his omelette is already cold. Not stone cold, but eatable cold. He nonetheless gulps it down, too hungry to even care about unimportant details such as the fact that it has been laying on the plate for over half an hour.

The family breakfast ends rather quickly since Baekhyun has to be ready by 7:50 (which, from past-past experiences, he never is), when his father almost shoves him in their outdated Ford Fiesta 2006 to deliver him to school. School that in Byun Baekhyun’s humble opinion is rather a waste of time. Especially the one class called Mathematics.

But, just another one of his assessments is the fact that the person teaching it might not be such a waste of time (or space).

When Byun Baekhyun finally steps inside the high school that has tortured way too many years of his life (around 4), he is already 5 minutes and 33 seconds late, if we exclude the 1 minute and 23 seconds walk to the classroom on the second floor. That roughly makes 7 minutes.

The hallway is empty, except for Mr. Bradshaw, the janitor whom he knows too well, from his regrettable days of hiding in the storage room.

“Hellooooo!” he says in his usual cheery tone, even though the only thing cheery about him right now would be the brightly colored blazer that he is wearing.

"Good morning, Baekhyun!” the man says, not even bothering to look up at him.

_Ungrateful._

The boy doesn’t even bother to speed up his pace, not even when the usual 1 minute and almost a half has turned into 3 full minutes. But when he sees the scratched door in front of him, he lets out a sigh and tries to convey the brightest smile he has ever displayed on his face.

“Moooorning, Mr. Park! Good morning, class!” he says, highly aware and happy that all the eyes are on him, especially the teacher’s when he enters the room.

“Sit down, Baekhyun.” the man says and points to the seat in the front row.

Exactly the spot that he has tried all his life to avoid with everything he could.

“But there’s a free seat over there.” he says, looking behind at the man with a hopeful smile that fades into a displeased puppy face.

“Sit down, Baekhyun.”

He finally obliges to the unfair command, and pulls the chair with a painful screech, before he finally sits down onto it with a thud and another screech.

“You really want to screw it, don’t you?” the boy next to him says in a hushed voice.

“You and your brilliant idea of…of acting like a nerd, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun says, too loud, since the teacher looks once again at him.

“I’m not. It’s not my fault that you are an idiot.” Kyungsoo says, showing the beginning of a smirk.

“Class. Speed test. 15 minutes. 3 exercises.” the man says, starting to give some small papers to everybody in the classroom.

“Crap.” Baekhyun says, hitting his head on the table with a highly audible thud which causes the boys sitting behind him to burst out in laughter.

“Quiet.”

“Is this your hint that you are fucked?” Kyungsoo asks and laughs.

“Shut up.”

“You are an idiot.” Kyungsoo says just as the man gives to both of them the white papers.

“Baekhyun. After class I need to talk to you.” he says, looking straight into Baekhyun’s eyes, eyes that are covered by a too long fringe.

“Yes…” he says, kicking the other boy in the shin underneath the table.

“It’s not my fault that you played whatever you played all weekend.” Kyungsoo says and sighs. “Didn’t he tell you to ask your mom to go see him or something?”

“And you think I’m that stupid?” Baekhyun says, looking for the first time at the set of exercises in front of him. “I’m fucked.” he says, hitting his head once more and a couple more times during the excruciatingly long 15 minutes and during the other 25, until the class has finally ended and him and Kyungsoo are the only ones left in the classroom.

“Good luck!” Kyungsoo says as he throws the backpack over one shoulder. “You know…I’ll bring gummy bears to your funeral. And a gaming console dressed in a wedding dress.”

“Shut up!!” Baekhyun says, trying to slap the other's bottom, but misses by only a few millimeters.

“See you at lunch time.” Kyungsoo says and disappears from the classroom.

But the person who appears, is Baekhyun’s worst nightmare in situations like this.

His mother.

“Crap!” he says, hitting his head one more time on the desk.

“Baekhyun. Please don’t embarrass me in front of Mr. Park.” his mother says, lifting his face with her slender fingers. “Act like an adult.”

“Aham…” he says, looking down at her nude stilettos. “Welcome to my realm?”

“Stand up. You are in big trouble.” she says in a whisper.

“Trouble is my name.” he tries to laugh, but he follows his mother nonetheless right to the front desk, where Mr. Park is already sitting down with some papers in front of him.

He can so clearly see his almost blank test, except for some rudimental drawings scattered around and the bright, red score of 1%.

“Please, sit down.” the man says, pointing towards the two chairs in front of the table.

“I swear I studied this weekend. And other weekends. I just…I feel sick. It’s really not my fault when-”

“Baekhyun. I would like for you to act as a serious and mature young adult and stop the buffoonery.” his mother says, almost throwing daggers at him with her brown eyes.

“Yes.” he says, but for whatever reason, he cannot suppress the laughter that is threatening to spill out of him at every second.

“Mrs. Byun, the problem is that Baekhyun is in the situation when he cannot pass my class. With his scores at the tests…I’m afraid he doesn’t even try to-”

“Of course I try, Mr. Park. But as I said-”

“If you interrupt your teacher once again, Baekhyun-”

“You said I’m a young adult…”

“Mr. Park, I would like for Baekhyun to receive private tutoring.” the woman quickly says, not even once looking at her son.

“Mooom, you cannot be doing this. Tutoring?!” he says, throwing his arms in the air.

“Baekhyun…as you can tell, it is for your own good.” Mr. Park says, offering him an understanding smile. “We could do them here, at school, after class.”

“This is a fantastic idea.” the woman says. “Two days per week would be excellent.”

“No, it wouldn’t.” Baekhyun says, standing up. “Where’s the freedom, where’s-”

“Sit down and watch your words, Baekhyun. You are not here with kids your age.” she says.

And so, just another usual Monday morning for Byun Baekhyun turned into an excruciating torture when his mother appeared. When lunch time finally drags him out of his continuous torment that its part of his new found gloomy life, he is more than eager to sit at a table and complain to Kyungsoo.

When he walks in the cafeteria, the boy is already there, eating all alone at a table exactly for two. For the past 12 years of their life, it has always been the two of them eating at a table, since Kyungsoo was rather introverted and Baekhyun too much of a clown to make any real friends besides him.

Baekhyun met Kyungsoo in the latter’s backyard, as he was trying to unsuccessfully hide from his mother as he ever so gloriously broke just the third vase that week.

And so, crawling between the bushes of the neatly decorated garden, he came face to shoes with Do Kyungsoo, only a couple of months and centimeters smaller than him. It would be a misunderstanding if we said that it was friendship at first sight. More so, almost broken bones at first touch, since Kyungsoo stepped onto Baekhyun’s hand without any mercy.

But in an inexplicable way, they have become and seemingly continued to be friends and neighbors, since the grand age of 5.

“I’m fucked.” Baekhyun says, as he sits down in front of the other and immediately steals his burger.

Kyungsoo keeps quiet as he stares at his precious food in the boy’s hands.

“You are supposed to ask why.” Baekhyun says, putting the burger down and serving himself with some fries.

“No. And stop eating my food.” he says, slapping him over the hand.

Baekhyun grunts and rubs the injured limb, offering to his friend a puppy stares that seems to be pointless as he goes back to his food.

“Mr. Park is tutoring me. Tuesdays and Fridays. Fridays, Soo…” Baekhyun runs his fingers through his brown hair.

“Isn’t this a good thing?”

“Are you out of your mind?” Baekhyun says, hitting the table so hard that the juice from the cup gets spilled all over the place, including Kyungsoo’s white shirt.

“Idiot.”

“That wasn’t planned.” Baekhyun smiles, handing him a seemingly used tissue.

“But coming back to your existential crisis. Didn’t you say you think he’s as hot as a steaming hot dog?”

“Yes…”

“Well, then enjoy your private sessions with the dude that all girls are fawning over.” Kyungsoo says, still vigorously rubbing his now not so white shirt. “I’m honestly going to kill you someday.”

“You’re a genius. GENIUS, SOO. Genius. Truly and really.” Baekhyun stands up, but quickly goes back to his place as some people are already pointing in his direction. “I have a fabulous plan!”

“Such as buying me a new shirt?”

“I’m going to make Mr. Park fall for me.” Baekhyun says with a huge grin on his face.

He jumps a little bit from his seat, hitting the table a couple more time.

“He’s like…27 and YOUR teacher.”

“It’s not illegal. I’m 19.” Baekhyun says with a smirk. “And I know a thing or two.”

“Really?” Kyungsoo raises his eyebrow. “You are an idiot and don’t even think about it. Don’t.”

“It’s a great idea. Have you seen how he looks?”

“I have eyes, you know, but I’m not an idiot like you. That’s all.” Kyungsoo says, placing the tray on the table next to theirs and beginning to walk.  

“Stop saying that.” Baekhyun smiles, wrapping an arm around Kyungsoo’s shoulders and laying a too wet kiss onto his cheek.

The other boy immediately sets himself free from the grip, increasing his speed bug nonetheless smiling as Baekhyun cannot see it.

“Idiot.” he shakes his head.

The rest of the day for Byun Baekhyun has been a constant mission for his mind to think of ways to ignite the fire in his teacher’s heart, or to come up with the best clothes to be worn during his tutoring sessions.

Not even the reality of having another talk with his mother is making him feel anxious inside, as his little mission is giving his life a new found purpose. One that doesn’t include making himself look like a clown.

So when his mother starts shouting at him from the middle of their living room, as he is watching TV with his sister on his side, the thought of his steaming hot dog teacher is somehow making everything more bearable.

“Byun Baekhyun, you are exactly like your father.” the woman says, pacing around the room.

“It’s not my fault that you married him.”

“You are not allowed to talk back to me, do you understand me? After what you did today, this is the last drop for me, Baekhyun. Did I make myself clear enough? If your grades won’t get better…I swear I’m going to-”

“Moooom! I’m hungry!” Lucy says, running straight to the kitchen.

“Where do you think you are going, Baekhyun?” the woman asks as the boy is climbing the stairs to his bedroom.

He doesn’t give any answer as he closes the door shut behind him and jumps onto his still unmade bed.

_This sucks…_

To nobody’s surprise, Baekhyun cannot just sit and stare at the random crack in his ceiling (that he also managed to create when he was playing football in his room), so after a couple more minutes, such as 30, he finally peaks his head through the space between the door and wall. The hallway is empty, so he finally leaves his room, walking onto his tip toes to the kitchen, as his stomach is furiously making war noises.

He notices that the door is closed and when he glues his ear to the wood, he can only hear his mother’s high voice mixing with his father’s lower one.

_Fighting again…_

Looking down at his stomach, he decides he can do without food and finally, he sprints back to his room, trying not to think about any of his existential non-clown related problems. Nonetheless, his heart is beating a little bit faster and his cheeks are tinted in a light shade of pink.

When he opens the door to his room, laying on his bed, with the duvet covering most of her body, is his sister, Lucy, silently sleeping.

Slowly, he sits down next to her, covering himself with the rest of the blanket. After of couple of seconds of turning and turning that question in his mind, Baekhyun finally wraps an arm around her thin frame, to bring her closer to his body.

He sighs, and tries to think about his fantastic plan, but his thoughts all circle around the argument between his parents.

_It’s none of your business, so stop it with that…think about tomorrow. That’s it. Think about how you’re going to make him fall in love with you._

And when the next day comes, Baekhyun realizes he hasn’t yet thrown the pink clock onto the floor. Because when he looks at it, it says 10:35:12 and for some unknown reason, he has slept in more than even his usual self would like to.

_Craaaaap!!!_

He looks around the room, with eyes filled with drowsiness and for a couple of seconds he thinks that he should make the Tuesday his extra free day. The duvet is warm and soft around him as he lays back on the comfortable pillow.

_Why not? It’s not like my mother hasn’t yelled at me enough yesterday._

And then, like a lightning bolt, the brilliant plan from yesterday shines in his tired mind.

Faster than he has ever been before, he throws onto him some random clothes he has found lying around his room and without even thinking about breakfast, he runs out of the door in the record time of only 4 minutes and 23 seconds.

In just another 21 minutes, he finally arrives to school, and to his surprise, not even being late for his fourth class. Mathematics.

“You are on time. And sweaty.” Kyungsoo says as Baekhyun sits down next to him.

“I’m sweaty because I ran. That’s why.” Baekhyun says between huffs, right when Mr. Park enters the classroom.

“Hello, class!” he says in his usual happy tone.

Baekhyun lets his head fall on the table and without any trace of shame, stares at the man’s bottom.

“You are out of your mind.” Kyungsoo says, whispering.

“No, I’m not. This is totally normal behavior.” he says.

For some unknown reason, his newfound favorite teacher doesn’t even pay attention to him for the entirety of the class, focusing more on writing some strange symbols onto the blackboard that Baekhyun cannot understand not even after he begs Kyungsoo to explain them to him.

Somehow, at 2 in the afternoon, after only 3 hours, Byun Baekhyun feels drained of any drop of energy. And for some other reason, when he steps back into the dreaded classroom, his hands feel sweaty and his heartbeat is abnormally high. So for another totally unknown reason, Byun Baekhyun decides that the best idea is to practically go home immediately and pretend that he forgot about the after school tuition.

The only small problem is that sometimes things don’t work as we would like them to, because when he opens the door, he is face to chest with no other than Mr. Park.

“Where were you going, Baekhyun?” the man asks, raising his eyebrow.

“Just-just-nowhere…” the boy says, sighing and realizing that maybe making someone fall in love with his clown self might be harder than he has thought.

Especially when that certain person is 7 years older than you and probably not into guys.

_Fantastic!_

* * *

 

_Some visual amazingness_

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally managed to write another chapter. Uni's been rather busy for the past few days (and also next ones) so I didn't have time to write as much as I would have liked.
> 
> Idk why, but this video [ EXO- Playboy Kyungsoo focus ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CRPHYPqDZM) has really inspired me.
> 
> enjoy :)

In the small but brightly colored world called Byun Baekhyun’s mind, 2 hours spent in the presence of an extra hot guy, who you can even call daddy if you actually fancy it, looks better than the not so bright reality he is currently part of.

Because the reality is an extremely tired and bored Baekhyun trying not to fall from his chair (or with it), as he balances it without much success as the said guy keeps talking.

“Baekhyun, did you hear what I said?” the man says, pressing a little too hard the pencil on the paper.

The tip breaks, leaving a sharp, black smudge over some numbers that make no sense in the other’s head.

“Yeah, yeah, of course…” Baekhyun says as he somehow tries to cover a yawn with his hand.

“Then repeat what I said.” Mr. Park raises one eyebrow.

_Does he actually tweeze them or are them so perfect on their own? Of course they are perfect. He’s-_

“Baekhyun.”

“What?” he asks as he pushes himself with the chair a little bit too hard; his leg slides on the floor and he’s almost lying flat on his beck if it wasn’t for his experience in the field.

In one not so smooth movement he manages to straighten himself and loudly cough.

“It’s clear that this is pointless.” the man says, closing shut the book in front of him. “I won’t-”

“Please tutor me. I promise I’ll do whatever you want.” Baekhyun quickly says, suddenly turning red and annoyingly sweaty as the implication of the words is beginning to sink into his brain cells.

_Fuck!_

“Go home, Baekhyun. I am not going to waste my time with someone that-”

“I’ll buy you food. Give you foot massages. Clean your house. I’ll clean your house and do the shopping, only don’t-don’t do it. My mother won’t feed me and-”

“Do you actually hear yourself?” the other asks, his hand still resting on the cover of the book, as his eyes are carefully analyzing the boy’s face.

“Yes, and please keep tutoring me. I promise I can do better. I mean, I don’t know if I can do better but really…I must pass my exams. Right?” Baekhyun says, feeling the sweat trickling down onto his back, right to his bottom, staining his white shirt.

He smiles, as bright as he can muster but in an instant, he hears the other sigh and rub a crease between those perfect eyebrows.

“I must think about it. Your behavior is-doesn’t matter. Go home.” Mr. Park says, sitting up. “And do your homework for tomorrow.”

“Yes, sir.” Baekhyun says, looking between lashes at the slim and long legs of the other.

_I wonder how they look-_

“And remember that I’m your teacher and that I’m older than you, Baekhyun.” he says, and with that he leaves the room and the boy all alone with his thoughts and too many papers with weird symbols all over them.

Finally, after too many torturous hours and failed attempts at practically making himself more desirable, Baekhyun arrives not home, but in someone else’s home. Kyungsoo’s. To me more exact, catapulted onto his friend’s bed.

“Am I not…sexy?” Baekhyun asks, watching Kyungsoo write something on his laptop.

The other just shrugs it off, slapping Baekhyun’s foot, as he is trying to scratch his head with it.

“That’s disgusting.” he says, looking back. “And no.”

“Oh, come on. Admit it. I’m hot.” Baekhyun says, finally sitting up on his bottom.

“Aham.”

“Don’t be a dick.” he says, slapping Kyungsoo over the head.

The boy immediately turns around, only after he placed the laptop safely on the floor, and with surprising force, pins his friend underneath his body before he starts kicking him wherever he can (without actually hurting him for that matter).

“Stooooooop it!!” Baekhyun yells, trying at the same time to bite the other’s hand.

“Fine.” Kyungsoo says, pushing himself off of him, on the spot between his friend and the wall.

“Admit it.”

“You know…someone can like you, whether or not you are sexy.” Kyungsoo says after a while.

“He is HOT.” the boy says, pouting at him.

“He is also your teacher.” Kyungsoo pushes him further away, since he can feel Baekhyun’s breath on his cheek.

“I’m sleeping here tonight.” he says, sighing.

“No, you are not.”

But, as other stuff in their life, for some unknown reason things do take the course that Byun Baekhyun wants, so after 6 hours of him pretending to do his math homework, call his mother and eat his friend’s food, he has managed to have his impromptu sleepover after all.

Since they were 5, Baekhyun has had the power to make Kyungsoo do things his own way, through different, more orthodox or not, means. But truth be told, even though Kyungsoo has always had predilection towards acting as if he doesn’t care about his friend, he cannott always hide it so well.

As in moments like this, when they are both lying in bed, underneath Kyungsoo’s deep blue duvet, with Baekhyun’s head leaning onto his shoulder.

Baekhyun has always felt warm and protected standing so close to his friend, even though Kyungsoo has never shown much appreciation for the skin ship that the other has forever appreciated, even having as a result a kick in different soft regions of his body.

But this time, one of his hands is wrapped around the other’s torso, playing from with the hem of his shirt.

“You know that Jongdae got some this weekend at that party that you didn’t want to come to.” he says.

“Huh…” his friend whispers, feeling his eyelids heavy as Baekhyun’s breathing is lulling him to sleep.

“Are you still with me?” Baekhyun asks, looking up at his face.

“Sleep…” he mumbles, cuddling closer to him.

Baekhyun smiles and closes his eyes, feeling contempt for some reason. Contempt, but for some other mystery reason, some strange and almost unknown feeling is emerging into his life. Anxiety.

_Are you crazy? It’s just tutoring…and so what you were less than formal with him? The whole point is to seduce him…ughh, of course you didn’t do it…_

Involuntarily, he slaps himself on his forehead, causing the other to shift in his sleep, but not wake up.

When morning comes, or rather the sunrays are brutally heating Baekhyun’s already red face, he wakes up to a rather embarrassing realization.

His fresh, morning erection pressed against his friend, who’s seemingly still sleeping undisturbed. With the speed of light, Baekhyun jumps out of bed and sprints to the bathroom, almost knocking down Kyungsoo’s mother in his way.

“Sorry…” he mutters before he shuts the door close behind him.

Finally, in the momentary safety of the room, he looks down at his proud erection, looking like a small tent in his black boxers.

_I’m not going to do it. I’m not going to do it. I’m not going to do it._

But it is too late, because his fingers are already wrapped around the base, rubbing it vigorously until, in the record time of 25 seconds, he comes, sticky and hot in the boxers.

“Fuck it.” he says, rapidly washing his hand and feeling as if he wants to burn the clothes on him.

After another 10 minutes, he emerges from the room, a little bit too red and rather cranky and more stressed.

“Morning!” Kyungsoo says, already dressed in his school clothes. “You were early today.” he says and Baekhyun blushes even more, but tries to hide it with a laugh.

“I’m a changed man.” he says, coughing.

“Sure, sure.” Kyungsoo laughs and Baekhyun wonders for the first time why his usually grumpy friend, Do Kyungsoo is actually smiling and in a good mood. “You didn’t forget that today we meet at Jongdae’s to do homework, right?”

Baekhyun looks (stares at him), and finally nods.

“Maybe if Sehun comes he’ll give me some advice. I mean…he had a fucking sugar daddy.” Baekhyun lifts his arms above his head as if he’s praying to some deity.

“You forgot he is 22.” Kyungsoo says and with that he leaves the room, shutting the door close behind him.

The rest of the day passes through fog for Byun Baekhyun, except for the math class, where he suddenly feels the need to be even more loud and obnoxious with the man that at some point is in the verge of shouting at him.

“Baekhyun.” Mr. Park says as he passes by the front desk with his eyes glued to the floor. “I am patient. But I cannot tolerate this behavior.”

“What behavior?” Baekhyun asks and pouts, before he leaves the room in a hurry, but not before looking back at the bewildered face of the other.

When it’s finally noon and the three boys are walking towards Jongdae’s house, Baekhyun can only think about two things: his morning wood and his math teacher (or a way to finally seduce him).

“You are quiet.” Jongdae says with a smile.

“Huh?”

“Kyungsoo told me you wanted to talk to Sehun?” he asks and Baekhyun’s face immediately brightens. “You are lucky. He’s so useless that he still lives with his papa and doesn’t have a freaking job.“ he says, finishing by chewing his bottom lip as he did before he has started speaking.

"Sugar daddies do count.” Kyungsoo says as the other punches him in the ribs.

Jongdae opens the front door and slowly, he peaks his head through the rather small crack. There’s a loud thud and the sound of something soft but big being thrown into something not so soft or inanimate. To be more exact, Jongdae’s head.

The pillow falls onto the ground and the boy fully opens the door and sprints with surprising speed in the direction of a guy who runs up the stairs. The younger one grabs his shirt and pulls him down with force-“Fuck you, Sehun!”-but the later grabs the handrail with both hands, stopping on a stair higher than the other.

“You are-” Sehun says, kicking his brother in the shin with his foot-“out of your fucking mind!!”

Jongdae reciprocates the hit, pulling even harder until Baekhyun and Kyungsoo can clearly hear the sound of material tearing, until Jongdae is left with a big chunk of Sehun’s t-shirt in his hand.

Both of them look at each other for a couple of seconds, placid expressions on their faces, before they burst out in laughter.

Kyungsoo glances at Baekhyun, who for the first time in a while, seems as shocked as his friend.

“Come in.” Sehun says with a guilty smile.

“That was-”

“Amazing!!” Baekhyun laughs, closing the door with too much force.

“That was a taste of our brotherly love.” Sehun says, ruffling Jongdae’s hair.

“I’m still mad. So don’t.” he says, slapping his hand. “Let’s go upstairs.”

The other two follow him suit, even though Baekhyun looks (stares) a couple of times behind at the one still sitting on a stair with the material in his hand.

“Sooo…maths or-”

“What the fuck was that?” Baekhyun asks.

“Me kicking his ass. Another question?”

“When can I talk to him?” he asks, throwing himself on the bed.

“So maths.” Jongdae concludes, taking the notebooks from his blue backpack.

Baekhyun looks at Kyungsoo (more exactly at his back) and wonders for the too many time this day how in the hell he didn’t feel anything in the morning.

_Maybe he’s good at lying. Of course he’s good. He’s Kyungsoo. He doesn’t even have a soul. What if I actually like him? No, of course I don’t like him. I like my math teacher. He is hot. Remember that. Morning wood is normal. Totally normal. He was sound asleep…that’s why he didn’t feel anything._

“You are mumbling.” Kyungsoo says, turned around and looking straight at Baekhyun.

“No, I’m not. Go and do your math.” he huffs, standing up. “I have no air in here.” he says, lifting the collar of the white shirt.

“Buy some. Sehun could give you his. He doesn’t need it anyways.” Jongdae says-“Fuck!!” he breaks the tip of the pencil.

“I’m actually going to him.” he says, leaving the room in a hurry.

He finds Sehun rather quickly, sprawled on his back, with the phone above his head, in his hands. When Baekhyun enters the room, the device falls down with a loud slap.

“Sweet!” the boy laughs, sitting next to the other.

“You are supposed to do your homework with my bro…” Sehun says, turning around.

“You know I don’t do mathematical relationships.” Baekhyun says in a deeper voice, but laughs half way anyways.

“Go!”

“Nooo!” he pleads, grabbing his hand and shaking it. “Teach me how to seduce someone.”

“What the fuck?!” Sehun laughs, finally facing Baekhyun.

They look at one another for some while, until Baekhyun breaks once again into laughter. He throws himself next to him, his head only inches away from Sehun’s.

“Who’s the unlucky one?” he asks.

“You don’t know him.”

“So it’s a him. Something else?” Sehun asks, pinching Baekhyun’s cheek.

“He’s older.”

“I see…is he also your math teacher?”

“How-how did-”

“Heard you say it.” Sehun smirks, pinching Baekhyun’s blushing cheek once more. “I don’t judge but I honestly thought you would have liked…Kyungsoo.”

“Why?” Baekhyun says in a shaper and thinner voice, his worries in regards to that subject growing once again.

“Just a thought.”

“Teach me how to get into his pants…my teacher’s, I mean.” Baekhyun grabs his hand, shaking it some more.

“No.”

“No?”

“No.”

“Sehun, I swear I’ll fucking rip the rest of the t-shirt off of you if you don’t tell me.“ Baekhyun says, sitting up, on his bottom.

"Still no.”

“Why not? Just a fucking advice.” Baekhyun asks with puppy eyes. “Does it have anything to do with me being friends with the idiot Jongdae? I swear I’ll go punch him right now if you tell me.”

“Still no.” Sehun smirks. “Now go do your homework.” he says, patting him on his head.

“I swear you are crazy.” Baekhyun says and with that, he finds himself once again sitting back on Jongdae’s bed.

“You know…Sehun is nuts.” he says.

“Tell me something new.” Jongdae says, breaking once again the tip of the pencil. “Fuck it!” he shouts, throwing it in the trash bin.

“If someone doesn’t give you advice on how to fuck your teacher it means that he’s sane.” Kyungsoo says in his usual calm tone.

“Haha.”

“I swear this day is crap.” Jongdae says, throwing this time the entire notebook in the trash. “I can’t believe my father is once again on a fucking business trip.” he says, emphasizing the word father.

Baekhyun has first met Jongdae when they were in middle school and for some reason he has started laughing when he saw him and Sehun, only a couple of centimeters taller than him back then, argue. Soon after (after he was almost punched by both of them) he found out that they are not real brothers, but step ones, since Jongdae was adopted as a baby.

Back then, their mother was still married to their father, who was going on just as many business trips.

“You could throw a party.” Baekhyun says.

“Or throw you and Sehun out the window.” Jongdae says.

“I need to concentrate. I actually want good grades.” Kyungsoo says, giving Baekhyun one of his specific- _I’ll kill you someday_ -look.

_Maybe I have it that small…_

“Baek, you should want that too…maybe Mr. Park will actually like you more if you started actually studying for his subject.” Jongdae says, finally picking the notebook from the trash and blowing the dust and dirt away from it.

“I don’t even know where to start…” he sighs and in this moment, his phone happily rings.

“Can it actually be Mr. Park?!” Jongdae laughs and Baekhyun throws a pillow in his direction.

“Shut the fuck up! It’s my mom…” he sighs once more and finally presses accept. “Hey, mommy!” he says, playing with the edge of his shirt. “But it’s only what-” he looks at his wrist watch-“5 thirty…fine.” he huffs.

“Go freaking home, you moron.” Kyungsoo says from his seat.

“Haha…Bye!” Baekhyun says and jumps off the bed.

“Really?” Jongdae raises an eyebrow.

“BYE!”

And with that, Baekhyun walks as slowly as he can on his way back home, not necessarily eager to see his mother or father for that matter.

The house is rather quiet and dark when he walks in, and for some other unknown reason he doesn’t feel like disturbing that. He quickly climbs up the stairs to his room and notices the door to his parents’ bedroom is slightly ajar.

Being the Byun Baekhyun he is, he silently walks to it and peaks through the crack.

His mother is sitting on the bed, with her head in her hands, her body trembling and shaking from time to time.

As much as he would like to play Prince Charming or Prince Helpful or any of those variations, all he does is run to his room, open and shut the door close after him.

He throws the black leather backpack on the floor and sits on the unmade bed. Without much passion, he stares at it until he unzips it and picks the thick, math notebook and complementary book.

They feel heavy in his hands, but finally, he sits once again on the bed, with both on his lap and opens them.

“Crap! Why did I think that I can do it?” he says after 3 hours and many, many torn pages and broken pencils.

Baekhyun would never say that he is the diligent type of person or student, never caring enough about his grades or  _status_. But for some reason, he doesn’t even think about calling his best friend to ask him for the homework in cause.

He does call him, nonetheless, but for other reasons.

“Do you think that cows dream?” he asks with a smile, already tucked in bed and feeling rather sleepy.

“Noo…why did you call?” the other says.

“Am I not allowed?”

“Alright, if you have nothing intelligent to say, I’m closing.” Kyungsoo says.

“You like me, right?” Baekhyun asks him quickly and wondering  _why??!_

“You are an idiot. Now go to sleep.” the other says, this time in a lower voice.

“Haven’t answered my question.” he says with more confidence.

“Bye.” Kyungsoo says and not so surprisingly ends the phone call.

Baekhyun throws the phone next to him and sighs, wondering for the nth time what has gotten into him.

_You really are an idiot…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are well loved :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, yay! I didn't have the time to edit this one as much as I would have liked, so there are probably some mistakes in there...  
> But what can I say, I'm really enjoying writing it and I have no idea where this is going...  
> enjoy :)

Thursdays are Byun Baekhyun’s worst, darkest, gloomiest, and you can practically add all the adjectives in the word, because nothing would change his opinion that two consecutive math classes is hell on earth.

Especially when the hell was created with such talent by the same person who’s once again running late and sprinting through the hallways of the too brightly lighted school, to finally enter the classroom.

The low, buzzing noise is quickly replaced by silence as his sweaty figure steps in. All the eyes are once again glued on him, and shushed laughter is beginning to form onto their lips. The only two people who are still not looking at him are Mr. Park and one Do Kyungsoo.

Do Kyungsoo who is so animatedly scribbling something on his notebook.

“Baekhyun. Sit down. You don’t need to protect the door.” the man says, giving him a bitterly amused look.

He does what he is told and sits (with a loud screech) on the chair next to his friend.

_First row once again, here we go…_

“Morning to you too.” Baekhyun says, tapping the other’s shoulder. “What’s up with the sour face?” he asks and pinches his cheek with undeniable satisfaction.

“Stop acting like a 5 year old.” Kyungsoo says, slapping his hand (this time with enough force to make it hurt).

Baekhyun only offers him one of his professional puppy faces, before he looks at the teacher’s back (ass).

“Stop staring. You’ll be able to see his Winnie the Pooh underwear.” Kyungsoo snorts.

“And you called me a 5 year old.” Baekhyun says, but laughs and looks at the other who smiles (too) fondly at him.

_I’m actually going insane. Of course I am…Kyungsoo is not acting differently. Of course he isn’t-_

But right in that moment, his friend’s hand falls on his thigh, squeezing it gently, but doesn’t move away. He jumps a little in his seat, coughing loudly just when Mr. Park turns around and stares straight at him. The hand is still there, and even though the gesture is familiar, he cannot help but feel as if it feels different.

“Baekhyun. To the black board.” the man says and he jumps for the second time, now for a totally different reason.

“Me?” he gulps down and the fingers are finally leaving his leg.

“Yes, you.”

And Baekhyun does so and picks up the chalk, smiling as brightly as he can as everyone in the room is once again looking at him. But not Kyungsoo.

And to nobody’s surprise, not even his, the chalk only serves as fidgeting material for him, as all the numbers and everything that the man says are turning into white noise. So much so that, in the middle of the exercise he only decides to make funny faces behind his back, at which everyone laughs and brightly smiles.

_Why am I such an idiot? I did it. I actually managed to do this exact crap at home and…fuck it!_

And after the terrifyingly long 20 minutes of being in front of the class, right at the black board, Baekhyun is back in the seat, only scribbles things on the notebook, not even once looking back at Mr. Park.

“At least you were funny.” Kyungsoo says, patting him over the arm.

“That’s my specialty.” Baekhyun says with a smile.

“Baekhyun…” Kyungsoo trails off, but doesn’t say anything else.

“I’m fine. Great. You know that I don’t give a fuck about this…” Baekhyun says, chewing his bottom lip.

The day passes as slowly as usual, the second math class only bringing him more on the edge of sleeping than anything else, as he cannot even concentrate on the words spoken by Mr. Park.

Kyungsoo is still standing on his right and looking from time to time at him and sighing lightly, without the other hearing him.

On their way back home, Baekhyun is not so unusually loud and obnoxious and Kyungsoo not so unusually quiet and reserved. And when they both stop on Baekhyun’s not so clean front porch, he quickly wraps both arms around Kyungsoo’s body, crushing him into a sickly tight embrace that usually the latter despises.

“You’re leaving me without air.” Kyungsoo says, but pats his friend’s back with a small smile on his face.

Baekhyun leans his head on the other’s shoulder, feeling for the first time that day calm and contempt, not embarrassed and unamused.

“Kyungsoo…” he whispers.

“Uhm…”

“I’m an idiot.” Baekhyun laughs, pressing his nose in the black t-shirt that smells like home and familiarity. It’s slightly rough, as the boy likes his clothes, with little fabric softener. But it holds his distinct scent that still reminds him of when they were children.

“Yes, you are.” he says and rubs a spot between his shoulders. “Today you were worse than usual.” he continues and finally steps away with a strange glint in his eyes.

One that Baekhyun knows too well, the one that usually means they have once again managed to break a couple of boundaries that Kyungsoo likes to keep stone cold.

“Wish me luck for tomorrow. In advance, you know.” Baekhyun smiles and punches the other in the shoulder.

“Goooo!” Kyungsoo says, but laughs nonetheless as he watches the boy run to the front door and open it with an exaggerated movement.

When Baekhyun enters the house, the continuous buzz of the TV can be heard coming from the living room, but except for that, everything is quiet. And he is thankful for that, as he sighs and walks to his room where he launches himself on the unmade bed.

He stares once again at the long crack on the ceiling, a couple smaller ones extending from it and for the first time that day, Baekhyun almost admits in his head that he feels like crap.

Like the pig pile of crap you find in the middle of the sidewalk and step right into it because you are too distracted to even care for that. Only when you get home and smear it over your freshly washed carpet you might see it and curse. Or maybe not even then.

But more than anything, Byun Baekhyun doesn’t really feel like laughing.

He sighs, and turns to the side to hug his knees and close his eyes.

When he opens them again, 4 hours later, it is already dark outside. He can hear faint noises coming from the room next to his, but as many other things, he ignores them. Putting the oversized pair of headphones on, he turns on the music and all of that is gone. His fingers are rhythmically tapping on the bed as the song reaches the chorus. A door is loudly shut close, the noise audible even through them, and he turns his head towards the wall that separates the two rooms.

Another noise makes him jump in surprise, so he turns the volume to a maximum, until he cannot even hear his own thoughts.

He doesn’t know, as he opens his eyes in the morning, when he has fallen asleep, but a thing is certain: the headphones are still on, but the music has stopped playing quite a while ago.

_Friiday_

Friday. The last of the nightmare inducing days for him, his slide towards the land of freedom that it’s being offered by the weekend, when he can fully act as he doesn’t give a damn.

When he walks into the kitchen, his usual omelette is not on the table and his sister is not eating on the seat next to his. Nor is his father trying to shave in the bathroom. Everything is quiet.

Only at regular intervals, a water drop is hitting the bottom of the sink.

“Fantastic!” he says out loud. “Fuck you alllllll!!” he screams, but it comes no response.

His fingers that are gripping the edge of the table have turned white at the knuckles and he can feel the wood digging in his palm.

Baekhyun looks around the kitchen, almost stepping to the fridge, but he immediately changes his mind and walks towards the front door.

“What a shitty day…” he says as a raindrop hits his head. “The perfect one to take the bus to school.”

To his luck, the said bus comes rather quickly, but even with all of that, when he walks into the classroom, 12 minutes and 45 seconds late, he is still as wet as if he dunked himself in a swimming pool.

He walks straight to the back of the room, where there’s still a free spot right next to Jongdae, Jongdae who is absently browsing his phone.

“That hair is sick as fuck!” Baekhyun says and shakes the other’s hand with a bright smile on his face.

“Took me 30 fucking minutes to do it. And of course the rain had to ruin it.” Jongdae says, chewing his bottom lip.

“Well…mine looks like a haystack so…shhh.” he says exactly when the old and cranky History teacher enters the room.

“He’s pissed.” Jongdae laughs.

“His pants.” Baekhyun says and bursts into a tearful giggle.

“Please tell me what it’s so funny that you are laughing? I shall laugh too.“ the man, who resembles a too old bulldog, says in a strange British accent.

Baekhyun looks at him and somehow, his laughter intensifies, even when Jongdae is kicking him from underneath the table.

"Mr. Byun. I don’t have enough patience for whatever little scheme you are doing over there. Please-” the teacher says, pointing with a chubby finger at the door-“get outside and calm yourself, otherwise I’ll deliver you to the Principal’s Office.”

The boy rapidly stands up and runs for the door, loudly closing it behind him as the people left in the room attempt to hide their laugher.

When the cooler air of the hallway hits him, he finally begins to calm down, only a dried out trail of tears remaining on his face. Without second thoughts, he leans on the wall and slides down on the red and white tiles.

“Fuck…” he says, feeling something wet underneath his bottom.

In that exact moment, no other than Mr. Park passes by him and stops right in front of him.

As Baekhyun has his head between his knees, he can only suspect another’s person’s presence in his proximity, but he doesn’t bother to see who might be.

“Today the circus is closed because it ran out of fuel from such an early hour.” he snorts.

“Baekhyun.” the man says.

He immediately recognizes the voice, of course he does, considering how many nights he has fantasized about hearing his named moaned in that deep voice.

“Stand up.”

Rather quickly, he does as he is told, coming face to chest, or to the perfectly ironed shirt of the other.

“Aren’t you supposed to be in class?” Mr. Park says, his eyes analyzing Baekhyun’s face, as the latter is moving from one foot to another.

“Well…Mr. Kingsley maybe kicked me out because I was maybe laughing?” he says with a guilty smile and stare into the other’s brown eyes.

“Of course.” the man sighs. “Come after me.” he says and starts walking, Baekhyun rapidly following him as his heart is quickening its pace.

“I promise I’ll be a good boy.” Baekhyun says in a soft voice and to his dismay, he cannot see the man’s reaction at his words.

But what he sees is that the other has increased his pace and the boy can barely catch up with him.

_The library?_

The man opens the door to the room and waits for Baekhyun to step in before he closes it after him.

“I have a spare our and you as well. I thought we could do some math or have a talk.” Mr. Park says, standing in the same spot near the door. “You choose.”

Baekhyun looks at his face, thinking for a second that he might be mocking him, but the expression on his face remained serious, unchangeable.

“Talk?”

“Alright.”

They both walk to the table in the back of the rather crammed library, and sit right next to each other.

“Consider me…a friend? Someone you can talk and open to, if you want. I am not the one to make assumptions but…maybe your…buffoonery and indifference are just a mask?” the man says, looking straight at the boy.

Baekhyun coughs, sweat already pooling at the base of his neck and trickling down his back. For once, he is at loss for words or any bad jokes.

“Can we do math?” he tries to smile.

“Baekhyun.” the man says, as the boy is fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

For some reason, when he looks up at him, he feels the tips of his ears burning, as a sudden anger builds up in his chest.

“There’s absolutely no need for me to justify my behavior to you. This is me. I’m the clown and nothing is hiding behind this.” he points at himself as he stands up from the seat. “I’m alright and I don’t need a pep talk. I’m stupid and that’s it. There’s nothing else.” Baekhyun says and runs out of the place before the other has any time to react.

He feels the blood rushing through his veins, ticking loudly into his ears as for some reason his eyes sting.

_Fuckitfuckitfuckitfuckitfuckit_

Once in the pouring rain, he falls down near the wall, hugging his knees and thinking for some reason about the loud slam of doors and voices the other night and the quietness today.

“Fuck it!” he says, hitting the grass next to him.

A thunder makes him flinch and look up at the grey and clouded sky. He is beginning to shake as the cold drops keep hitting him.

“Baekhyun.” he hears the man’s voice and suddenly the rain stops.

Or just a blue umbrella is above his head.

“You’re going to get sick.“ he says. "Let’s go inside.”

But Baekhyun shakes his head in response, feeling as a wet rug, too aware that the guy that has been the center of all his fantasies is seeing not the clown, but the pitiful version of himself that he almost forgot he has had.

A warm hand covers his and when he looks up, the other is getting closer to him as he wraps an arm around his thin frame.

Without any second thoughts, he leans onto the man’s chest, breathing in the comforting scent of soap and fabric softener.

“I’m sorry…” he says, muffled by the fabric.

“What for?”

“For being a pain in the ass…” he giggles.

The man laughs, shaking the boy but carefully, starting to rub large circles on his wet back.

“You’ll get pneumonia…and I suppose you don’t have other clothes at school, right?” Mr. Park asks, looking down at Baekhyun red face.

“No…”

“I have some…for emergency situations.” he smiles and retracts his gaze to the grass.

Silence settles between them as Baekhyun continues to lean on him and the man to gently massage his cold back. For some reason, he almost feels warm in the other’s arms and for another not so strange reason, his heart is crazily beating in his chest. But he finally stands up at the same time as Mr. Park, and they both start walking back to the high school.

“If I go home…how bad will you kill me?” Baekhyun asks as they enter the building.

“Not that much. You can go, if that’s what you so obviously want.” he smiles and opens the door to the classroom for them. “The clothes are somewhere over here.” he says and starts searching through the drawers near the desk. “They might be too big.”

He finally stands up with a small pile in his hands, all the garments being black.

“I’ll wait outside.” he coughs.

And this is how Baekhyun sees himself walking home through the pouring rain, with Mr. Park’s umbrella over his head, dressed in his clothes and smelling like him. Because after he has changed in his new garments, he messaged Jongdae to take care of his backpack and with a shy wave and goodbye to the man, he left home.

He smiles to himself, looking down at the too long sleeve of the t-shirt that it’s covering his entire hand. When he is thinking more about it, maybe even his feelings for the man have changed quite drastically. More so, he would rather want for him to hug him and say that he is alright than anything else.

_You’re such a sentimental moron, Byun Baekhyun…_

But when he unlocks the door to the house he is only welcomed by the dreaded feeling of emptiness. Alone once again. For some reason, he decides that what he should do is take another nap, in his teacher’s clothes that smell so calming, for some reason.

And when he wakes up hours later, it is already dark outside and Baekhyun hates the thought of staying all alone at home, on a Friday night.

So, he quickly sprints out of the room, looking for a couple of seconds towards his parents’ bedroom, and then, after some more indoor jogging, he’s out in the street, walking towards Kyungsoo’s house.

He knocks at the door and only after a couple of seconds a woman that looks like the feminine and older version of Kyungsoo opens it with a warm smile.

“Baekhyunnie.” the woman says.

“Good evening, Mrs. Do. Is Kyungsoo home?” he asks.

“Of course he is-"she says and welcomes the boy inside-"do you know him as the type to go out?” she laughs.

Baekhyun does too and for some reason, he feels more at home in his friend’s house than in his own.

“He’s in his room, playing video games.” she continues, patting Baekhyun’s back.

“Alright. Thank you.” he smiles.

“Do you want anything to eat? I’ve made pudding.” the woman says as the boy is already climbing up the stairs.

“Pudding sounds fantastic.” he almost shouts and finally steps into Kyungsoo’s room.

“What are you playing?” he asks the rather concentrated boy.

“Skyrim. You weren’t at school today.” Kyungsoo says, somehow finding the strength to close the game and turn around to look straight at Baekhyun.

“You want the long or short version?”

“Short.”

“Well…I was kicked out by Mr. Kingsley, on the hallway I met Mr. Park, I somehow ran outside in the rain, he came after me and let me go home.“

"Are those his clothes?” Kyungsoo asks with just another half-smile.

“101%.” Baekhyun smiles.

“You are moving fast.” his friend say, but usually, from Baekhyun’s experience he knows that whatever Kyungsoo is attempting to do, make him feel better, be his strange way of encouraging, will quickly fade.

The door opens and the woman comes inside with two decently sized bowls with the still warm chocolate pudding.

“Bon appetit.” she smiles, looking from one boy to another before she leaves.

“Your mother is fantastic.” Baekhyun says, playing with the spoon in the pudding.

“I guess.” Kyungsoo shrugs. “You look like crap, by the way.”

“Oh.” Baekhyun’s jaw drops a little because he has always thought that he is particularly good at hiding his emotions.

“You thought I wouldn’t notice?” Kyungsoo snorts.

“Honestly…yes.”

“So…what’s on your mind?” his friend says from his plush chair.

Baekhyun is sitting on the bed, shoving spoonfulls of pudding into his mouth. To his growing surprise over the years, in moments like this, when Baekhyun would be down in the dumps, Kyungsoo would always break his thick icy layer of indifference and for an hour, two or God knows how many, he would actually show Baekhyun that he indeed cares about him.

He has never been sure to what extent those feelings would go, because Kyungsoo was even better than Baekhyun at hiding all his emotions. But he is somewhat certain that they at least are there.

“My folks…I guess they are getting a divorce. Or at least that’s what I’d do if I were them. They fight every fucking day and act as if me and Lucy are just some-I don’t know. I’m not supposed to care.” Baekhyun shakes his head, huffing.

Kyungsoo remains quiet, looking down at the bowl in his hands. From past experiences, he is aware that his friend is not the one with the words. More with the listening part of things.

“And then-” Baekhyun wants to say, but doesn’t, because even for him it is hard to admit that he is sick and tired of the role of a clown that he has practically chosen for himself.

Or even to admit that for the past couple of days he feels different when he’s around Kyungsoo, or when he’s touching him.

Those are too intimate thoughts for Baekhyun to voice out.

Kyungsoo looks up at him and licks his lips, melting away the remaining chocolate on them. Baekhyun knows this is not a studied gesture, or even anything to be taken into account, but he cannot help and gulp down the knot in his throat.

“You don’t have to tell me if you’re not ready.” Kyungsoo says, placing the bowl on the table.

He takes Baekhyun’s empty one as well, and does the same thing with it.

The boy paces some more around the room before he finally settles on the bed, right next to Baekhyun.

Slowly, the latter lets his head fall on his shoulder, a part of him afraid that he will be pushed away. But he isn’t.

After a couple more minutes of staying in silence, they decide on watching a movie, something they haven’t done in so long.

Kyungsoo runs to the bathroom to change in his pajamas and Baekhyun rapidly checks his phone, almost expecting to see too many worried massages from his mother. There is only one, telling him she know he’s staying over at Kyungsoo.

When the other finally comes, Baekhyun is already snuggled underneath the duvet, and to his surprise, when the boy crawls next to him, Kyungsoo doesn’t leave any space between their bodies, as he leans entirely on him.

It is warm and comfortable, but he cannot stop wondering if he is actually doing everything out of pity or if he actually feels like being this close to Baekhyun.

He wraps an arm around his middle, his head being right underneath Baekhyun’s chin and the latter can only sigh in contempt.

“Are you actually watching it?” Kyungsoo asks after a while, looking up at him.

Baekhyun shakes his head, smiling and then, the other shuts the laptop close and puts it on the surprisingly empty nightstand.

Now it is all dark in the room, and Baekhyun wishes he could see Kyungsoo’s face.

The boy’s hand is still around his middle and when Baekhyun turns around, it shifts only a little bit. He knows they are face to face, from the way the other’s warm breath is hitting his face.

Now, the contours of the face are more distinguishable.

Baekhyun moves a little closer to him, a little too close, because their noses bump into one another, but Kyungsoo doesn’t say one word, only his breath is shakier and hotter.

They both smile, and giggle quietly, as Baekhyun fingers touch the other’s jaw. This is the closest they have ever been and it makes Baekhyun’s heart beat crazily in his chest.

He giggles once again, but the sound is cut short as something soft and warm briefly touches his lips. It lasts for a fraction of a second, not even a chaste press of mouths, but a feathery touch, an aftertaste that lingers for too long afterwards.

Baekhyun can now see very clearly through the darkness his friend’s features, the big eyes that are looking back at him and lips in a small pout.

He closes the distance once more and kisses him, this time for longer, but just as light and filled with fear.

Kyungsoo shifts closer to his chest, until Baekhyun cannot see his face. He closes his eyes and in the darkness the only thing he hears is their breaths and heartbeats. Loud and there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love comments :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, first of all, yayy, new chapter!! Tomorrow or maybe on Saturday another one will go up.  
> I always associate a song to the fic I write and I finally found the one for this [ Amy Macdonald-This is the life ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRYvuS9OxdA) This is (slightly embarrassed face), one of my favorite songs of all times. It used to be played on the radio when I was going with my parents to the countryside and I suppose I have a few emotions and memories linked to it. Okay, it makes me feel a certain way when I listen to it. But the point is, I think it fits this fic.
> 
> enjoy :)

When Baekhyun wakes up in the morning, the spot next to him on the bed is empty and cold, only the slight indentation in the mattress telling that someone slept there.

He yawns and stretches his body for a couple of sweet seconds, not remembering the events of the night. But then, quickly, it hits him, or more so his fingers touch his lips and the strange flashback happens.

_Fuck…_

He rashly stands up, almost falling in his lame romantic comedy move of running downstairs and confessing his infinite love that he has been hiding for his best friend.

Truth be told, his bladder almost hurts and bursts and to add to all of that, his head not so surprisingly throbs too. So he only rushes to the bathroom, but the door is closed. He turns a couple more (furiously) times the knob, but it still doesn’t move.

“Busy.” a voice that resembles too much the one of his best friend says.

“I’m going to pee your carpet if you don’t open it!” Baekhyun yells, as if the tender kisses from last night have been erased from his mind.

“You won’t dare!” Kyungsoo says a little bit louder.

“I will-” the boy hits the wood-“open it, it fucking hurts, you moron!!” Baekhyun practically growls, pressing his thighs together until his feet hurt more than his bladder.

“2 minutes.”

“Opeeen!!” Baekhyun growls some more.

He pushes himself into the door with all his force and in the exact same time, it opens and Baekhyun falls inside, more exactly all over Kyungsoo.

“What were you doing? Admiring your beauty?” Baekhyun says, undoing the elastic of his pajamas and pushing them to the floor.

“Are you seriously going to do it in front of me?” Kyungsoo asks, covering his eyes.

“You act as you haven’t seen a dick.” Baekhyun says, unsure even why he is acting the way he does with the other.

“I don’t need to see yours.” Kyungsoo says and shuts the door after him, leaving Baekhyun all alone with his own dick in the bathroom.

Baekhyun finally opens the door and peaks his head through the crack. The hallway is empty.

He walks back to the bedroom, where Kyungsoo is standing on the bed with a notebook in his hands. Coughing, he enters, feeling unsure of whatever he feels like doing.

“You mad?” he asks, still standing in the doorframe.

“Why would I be?” the other says.

“Because…I mean, if it’s about you know…we can totally just forget about it?” Baekhyun says, shifting from one foot to another, smiling lamely at him.

“You should eat. I made some sandwiches. They are in the kitchen.” Kyungsoo says, standing up.

He quietly places the notebook back into the backpack, and then heads to the closet in the corner of the room.

Baekhyun looks for a little longer at him before he finally leaves, sighing lightly.

Kyungsoo turns around to see the shape of the other disappear from the doorframe before he sighs too and shakes his head.

When Baekhyun finally finishes the sandwich, Kyungsoo is walking in the room as silently as he can. But, whether Baekhyun has developed extraterrestrial capacities or the boy is really not that discreet, he immediately turns around at the light rustle of clothes.

“I should probably go home…” Baekhyun says, noticing for the first time that the too long sleeve of the shirt is dirty. With strawberry jam and peanut butter. “Crap!!” he yells, waving the arm around.

“What?!” Kyungsoo asks with concern visible on his face, rapidly covering the distance between them.

He takes the other’s arm into his hand and suddenly lets it fall back down.

“That’s food…”

“Sorry…” Baekhyun smiles, staring at the two dirty fingers of his friend.

Kyungsoo glances down too and grimaces, before he picks a tissue from the countertop to clean them.

Both of them are standing rather close to one another and Baekhyun feels the same way as the previous night. Flustered and scared, worried about everything and anything. That his latest thoughts might actually be true.

“What?” Kyungsoo asks, smiling.

“Nothing…” he smiles too, looking up at him with big eyes.

For some unknown reason he keeps staring at the other’s plump lips, lips that so surprisingly touched his, even though for only a couple of seconds.

_This is nuts. I’m going crazy. Stop staring._

He rashly stands up, but the space between them is too small and Kyungsoo doesn’t move, so he only bumps into the other. An arm wraps around his middle to stabilize him and Baekhyun only thinks that his heart might be beating a little bit too fast. But Kyungsoo lets go of him just as quickly and makes an unnecessary amount of steps behind, until he hits the fridge with his back.

“I-I should probably go…” Baekhyun says as he waves him goodbye, smiling dumbly when he laces his shoes up, when he opens the door and waves some more as he steps outside. Then, the smile immediately disappears.

He runs to his house and when he opens the door, he has to push it harder in order for it to fully open. A big stack of suitcases and boxes is scattered all around the entrance hallway.

“What the heck?!”

“Dad is going to move with his parents for a while!” Lucy says from the doorframe of the kitchen.

“What?!”

“Mommy said that sometimes adults need to live with their parents too…as we do.” she continues.

“Did she tell you for how long?” the boy asks.

Lucy only shakes her head and disappears back into the kitchen, leaving him alone once again. Glancing up at the staircase, he notices his mother looking at him as she descends with a serious mine on her face.

“It’s good that you finally deigned to get home.” the woman says. “I had to be called by Kyungsoo’s mother to find out that you are sleeping there…”

“Why didn’t you tell me that dad is leaving?” he asks, digging his fingernails in the palm of his hand.

“Baekhyun…” she trails, stepping closer to him and closing at the same time the door to the kitchen.

“I deserved to know before-before-” he says, pointing towards the stack of boxes and bags.

“We-I-you must understand that it is complicated…”

“Of course it is, when you still treat me like a child!” he shouts, hitting one of the boxes with his foot.

“Baekhyun…you don’t want to talk to me about why I’m still treating you that way. You know it very well. Yesterday?” she asks, crossing the arms across her chest.

He huffs, biting hard on his bottom lip, reciprocating her gesture.

“Mr. Park called me yesterday to tell me your History teacher kicked you out of class and that when he tried to talk to you, you simply ran away? Can you explain this to me?!” she asks, patting the foot on the floor.

“I can’t believe that-”

“What can’t you believe? That your behavior is unacceptable, that it’s so hard for me to understand you?!”

“Maybe because you don’t even try!” he says, rapidly running past her, up the stairs and into his room.

He shuts it close with force, locking it with trembling fingers. After a couple of seconds, he sees the knob furiously twisting and his mother’s voice is sharp and painful into his ears.

“Baekhyun! Open the door! Open it when I tell you!” the woman says but Baekhyun only slides down onto the floor, hugging his knees and feeling that his eyes are burning. _Fuck it!_ He hits the hard wood with his fist, making it to painfully throb, as one last knock and twist of the knob can be heard.  

The weekend passes infernally slow for the boy, only leaving the enclosure of his room to use the bathroom or steal some food from the kitchen. And when Monday comes, he is rather joyful to finally escape from the house, even just for school. Especially because the only person he had talked to, through messages of course, was Sehun, who not so surprisingly acted like a total nut case.

But as he steps into the classroom, 10 minutes earlier than ever, since it seems like the only decent time the bus comes is at 7:30, he feels all the excitement leaving him. More so, he feels like a hot air balloon, in miniature size, being squished to death by life.

Mr. Park is already sitting at the desk and when he sees the boy come in, he smiles fondly and intertwines his fingers on the table.

“Baekhyun!” he says.

“Hello…” the boy greets, feeling suddenly stupid holding the “ _tried to be washed_ ” clothes from Friday. If you looked closely at the sleeve of the t-shirt, there’s still a trace of that stain left.

“I brought you the…clothes.” he says and puts them on the table. “I…yeah.”

“How are you?” Mr. Park says, reaching forward to pat Baekhyun’s hand.

“Fine.” he says, taking a couple of steps back.

“Baekhyun…I don’t want you to hide inside-”

“You said I’m supposed to consider you a friend. What friend calls the other’s mother afterwards?”

The man presses his lips tightly together and sighs, playing with the garments in front of him.

“I’m your teacher…before anything else. And your mother should know about whatever, bad or good, you do at school.” he says.

Baekhyun looks at him and then at the empty classroom, feeling even more idiotic than before.

“So none of you trusts me. That’s what you are implying.” Baekhyun says and in that exact moment, the door opens and a couple of boys and girls enter, talking loudly and covering his raging heartbeat.

He turns around and takes a seat in the back of the room, trying not to look at the other who is so obviously staring at him. After other 5 minutes, Kyungsoo walks in and stands for a couple of seconds in the front, avoiding Baekhyun’s gaze, before he finally takes a seat in the first row.

Jongdae quickly fills up the spot next to Baekhyun, laughing loudly at something.

“Are you actually hitting on Sehun?”

"Nooo. WTF dude?!” Baekhyun says, bursting out in laughter.

“You talked to him all weekend. That’s creepy.” Jongdae continues, raising his eyebrows. “I only thought you were into older, teacher type guys. Not older, idiot and useless type Sehuns.”

“Fuck off.” Baekhyun says, slapping him over the arm. “Sehun does have the greatest body, though. Quite a-”

“I’ll tape your mouth if you say another word about that moron.” Jongdae raises his arm in Baekhyun’s direction, but smiles nonetheless.

Mr. Park coughs loudly, shushing all the chatter and looks straight at Baekhyun, Baekhyun who tries to avoid his gaze.

“Dad found himself another chick.” Jongdae says out of the blue, when Baekhyun is drawing some odd shapes onto the notebook.

“Huh? Does she have a rack, at least?”

“Fake one, but yeah…” Jongdae says, putting his head on the table. “He’s going to take her to France and Italy and skiing in Switzerland during the winter break. She’s only 21, dude…” he huffs, pressing his forehead onto the wood.

“Huh…mine will get a divorce.” Baekhyun says, pressing the pen too hard on the paper, creating a little tore in it.

“Oh…are you…?”

“Perfect. I didn’t like him anyways and now there are no more annoying arguments.” he laughs.

“Sure, sure? I mean, if you want to talk about it…I have experience.” Jongdae says, looking over at his friend.

“I’m fine. Really.” Baekhyun says, smiling again.

The class finally ends and he rushes out of it, not wanting to see neither Kyungsoo, nor Mr. Park. So, for the rest of the day, he tries to hide his face from both of them as best as he could. When lunch break happily comes, he runs out and walks right to the small yard in the far back, rather filled with weeds garden, where there’s a lonely bench. He sits down and picks up the sandwich from the black backpack.

“Thought so I’ll find you here.” a voice says and when he looks up there’s no one other than Kyungsoo, standing before him, with a shy smile on his face.

He smiles, bright and toothy, as if his whole purpose for the day wasn’t to hide from the other.

“Can I sit?” he asks and Baekhyun only nods.

He goes back to eating the sandwich and Kyungsoo to moving his feet back and forth. It’s quiet and the boy looks from time to time at Baekhyun, but doesn’t say anything.

Finally, he finishes the food and the only thing he has to do is stare at the dirt in front of him, twirling in miniature tornadoes at his feet.

“So…” Kyungsoo says.

“So…” Baekhyun repeats after a while.

“If you are mad about Friday…you must be mad about Friday since-”

“Let’s not talk about Friday.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.” Baekhyun sighs, still staring at his shoes.

“Are you free after school?” Kyungsoo asks.

“I’m always free after school.” Baekhyun says and smiles.

“We could watch Thor…You’ve always said that I should see it.” Kyungsoo says, grinning and looks from behind his rather not that thick set of lashes at Baekhyun.

“But we watch it at your place.” Baekhyun says, punching the other in the arm and then running towards the school without looking back.

“Hey, you idiot! Wait for meeeee!!” Kyungsoo shouts and proceeds to follow Baekhyun, Baekhyun whose heart is beating too fast, even for running, and whose cheeks are flushed a too deep shade of pink.

Baekhyun, who, the moment he steps foot in the school, somehow manages to bump into no other than Mr. Park.

After the initial shock of hitting his nose in a hard chest, Baekhyun almost falls on the floor if it weren’t for the other, who grabs him (almost in his arms).

“Careful…” the man says, his voice being a little bit too loud for the now empty hallway.

The hands are still on his arms, keeping him in place even though by now Baekhyun has already regained his balance.

“I’m sorry…” the boy says, not daring to look up at the other.

“You must know that I do trust and respect you, Baekhyun…” he says, glancing down.

His hands finally fall down, besides his body and for some reason, the boy feels a little disappointed and cold.

“I’m sorry…”

“Stop apologizing.” the man laughs and gently touches the other’s arm.

“I’ll stop, then.” he pouts, stepping aside. “But I should probably go to class…” he says.

“Me too.” the man laughs and Baekhyun does too.

Finally, Kyungsoo steps from behind a corner, with a suddenly displeased grimace onto his face. He doesn’t try to catch up with his friend, who is only a couple of meters ahead of him, only walks with the hands in the pockets, looking down.

The day passes awfully slowly for both of them, and when they see themselves walking next to each other on the route they’ve walked for so many years, Baekhyun thinks that he can erase with a sponge everything that has happened and make everything go back to normal. Because he wants everything to be the same, not changed and uncomfortable.

“Mr. Park seems warmer towards you.” Kyungsoo says.

“You think so?”

The boy only shrugs the questions off with a shake of his shoulder, choosing to focus back on the sidewalk ahead of him.

“You know that Jongdae’s father has a new girlfriend? I wonder how he manages to get them all pretty and with a rack.” Baekhyun laughs.

“You want one too?” Kyungsoo asks, looking for the first time at his friend.

“Neah…too high maintenance. I’d much rather get a sugar daddy.” Baekhyun smiles widely.

“Mr. Park?”

Baekhyun blushes a deep shade of pink, trying to hide it by pulling the hood of his shirt more on his face.

“He’s too young for one…plus, I bet he gets some almost every day. When you look like that-damn!”

To Baekhyun’s happiness or mental and facial sanity, Kyungsoo finally twists the key and the door to his house opens with a screech.

“That needs some more oil.” the boys huffs. “My parents are not home for tonight so there’s also no food either. We have to cook or order takeout.” he continues as he searches through the fridge.

“I say pizza.” Baekhyun says with a grin.

“Call your mother. Mine told me that-you know, you two are not on good terms.” Kyungsoo says, clearing his throat.

“I will, I will.”

“I’ll do it for you if you don’t.” Kyungsoo says with a stern look on his face.

“Fine, fine…” Baekhyun mumbles.

In the end, at 8'o'clock at night, beside Baekhyun and Kyungsoo, there are also Jongdae and Sehun, invited by an overzealous Baekhyun, who only after he texted his mother, had he realized that he would have to spend a night alone in the same house and room with Do Kyungsoo.

So he did what he knew best. Which I will leave to your judgement and discretion.

After 10 other minutes, they are all on the rather comfortable couch, Baekhyun sitting in an unfortunate place: squished between Sehun and Kyungsoo.

There’s a blanket covering all four of them and Baekhyun can vividly feel the way his thigh is pressed into the other’s one. None of them is making any sound and from the low snores coming from Jongdae, it is safe to assume that at least one of them is sleeping. The only problem Baekhyun has is sitting right next to Kyungsoo, and for some reason being comfortably warm and soft. But, to his better judgement, he lets his head lean on Sehun’s shoulder who only hums in approval.

Kyungsoo quickly glances at them and presses the tip of his tongue on the cheek.

“This movie is crap. I knew I shouldn’t have listened to you.” Kyungsoo says as he yawns. “And Jongdae is almost sleeping on me.” he stands up, pushing the blanket aside.

“Where are you going?” Baekhyun asks.

“My room. Finish some homework and play something.” he says and doesn’t wait for the other’s answer because he’s already climbing up the stairs.

“He has a carrot up his ass. Or maybe he wants one up there.” Sehun laughs, shaking Baekhyun a little.

“Shut up and watch it.” Baekhyun says, pinching his leg.

“Fuck you!” Sehun snaps, slapping the other over the hand.

“Fuck me, then.” Baekhyun laughs but Sehun only slaps him one more time.

Even though Sehun has always been the “hottest” one in the bunch, or at least since Baekhyun has met him, the elder has only been and is to him a brotherly figure or at least the person he feels okay telling his darkest and deepest secrets. He has always had that quality of not judging anybody or surprisingly, not telling to the others, someone’s secrets.

“Whose blame is for the carrot? Did you push it in?” Sehun asks.

“Fuck off.”

“Baekkie…”

“Stop with that!” he says and pinches him a couple more times.

“Well, you like it when Kyungsoo calls you that.” he says, looking at the other. “So, what did happen between you two?” he raises an eyebrow.

In the dimly lighted room, Baekhyun can see Sehun’s eyes sparkling, reflecting the green costume that Loki is wearing on screen.

“Nothing important.” he says. “And it’s none of your business.” Baekhyun pokes the tongue at him.

“Usually, it’s none of my business when you’ve made an ass of yourself. Which is all the time.” Sehun says.

“Funny. And no.”

“Come on. I’ll give you advice.”

“No.”

“Come on.”

And Baekhyun is on the verge of telling him the truth, but in the last second, when his mouth opens, it closes just as quickly.

“No.” he says and stands up, only too late realizing that he is actually heading towards Kyungsoo’s bedroom.

He lightly knocks at the door and soon after comes Kyungsoo’s voice-“come in!”

He does so, slowly and closes the door after him just as deliberately.

“Hey…” he says, looking at Kyungsoo who is already under the same navy duvet with the laptop on his lap.

“Hey…” the other glances up at him. “Wanna sit?” he asks, patting the spot next to him. Baekhyun nods and walks towards the bed, before he crawls onto it and under the cover.

“Got bored of the movie?”

“Got bored of Sehun.” he says, laughing.

“You’ll get too warm, dressed like that.” Kyungsoo points and Baekhyun’s hoodie and extra thick sweats.

Rather quickly, he throws the hoodie on the chair next to the bed and slower, or with more embarrassment, does the same with the pants, this entire scheme leaving him only in his boxers and t-shirt.

“Better?” Kyungsoo asks, but Baekhyun can only focus on his plump lips that keep moving. “You okay?”

“Yeah, yeah-fabulouus!” he laughs, but he keeps staring at them and as he does so, he licks his (without even realizing).

He comes a little bit closer to the other, until their bodies touch, touch a little too much for comfort.

Kyungsoo doesn’t close the laptop in front of him, but he pushes it further aside. He glances at Baekhyun who is the one this time to close the distance between their lips until their noses touch once again, making them giggle.

But Baekhyun finally presses his mouth on the other’s, soft and light as the first time. Kyungsoo locks his fingers in the boy’s hair, pulling him even closer until their chests are pressing together. The kiss deepens, Baekhyun making a small, husky noise in the back of his throat when Kyungsoo pushes the tongue inside his mouth. It tastes exactly how he has imagined, it’s hot and-“What the actual fuuuuck?!” the door slams to the wall and in the doorframe, there’s an ex-sleepy Jongdae staring at both of them with his mouth ajar.

_I’m fucked…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Also, because I don't suppose that this fic will be done till Christmas, I might do a Christams special type of chapter, all fluffy and sickly sweet.  
> -moreover, this is quite baeksoo based chapter, but the next one will be a baekyeol centric  
> -if you cannot tell, I can't choose between Chanyeol and Kyungsoo, and because I don't have a clear ending in mind...this will be done on the spur of the moment
> 
> Comments are well loved


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be a rather angsty one, so you've been warned.  
> Also, this is finally a chanbaek centric-ish one, where I hope there's some development between them.  
> I'm sorry for any mistakes, but I really don't have as much time as I'd like to edit it, so it might be a little bit raw...
> 
> enjoy :)

It would be an understatement if we said that having four guys standing in a kitchen, with two of them in only their boxer briefs (a pair even with Hulk and Thor fighting) and t-shirts, and the other two fully dressed, it is totally normal.

Because Baekhyun is moving from one foot to another, rubbing his upper arms from time to time, as Kyungsoo is standing lengths away from him.

“So, the conclusion is that Jongdae is an idiot and it’s none of our business.” Sehun says, like the father to his sons.

“Says the King of Morons.” Jongdae huffs.

“Let’s sleep.” Sehun continues, walking straight to the couch.

“I’ll take the couch. With Sehun.” Baekhyun rapidly say, trying to look everywhere else but at Kyungsoo.

As much as he tries, he cannot help but practically stare at him as he passes by, and he’s almost tempted to grab him by the wrist, turn him around and press a kiss onto his lips. Or actually, have an actual conversation with him.

“You-” Sehun laughs, pointing towards the other-“you are a train wreck. And a miserable one too.” he laughs some more, throwing his pants on the floor. “So this was the carrot up Kyungsoo’s ass. Yours.”

“Shut the fuck up! There’s no carrot up anyone’s ass!!” Baekhyun shouts, kicking (repeatedly) the other in the shins.

“So I was right! You actually like Do Kyungsoo. You are a masochist!” Sehun grins, his eyes glimmering in the bright light of the room.

Baekhyun feels his ears being set on fire by a million of burning carrots that are gravitating around his head.

“Whatever.” Baekhyun mumbles, throwing himself on the couch and fully covering his body with the blanket.

“Don’t be like this…” Sehun says, uncovering his head. “There’s nothing wrong-”

“Everything’s wrong, so shut the fuck up and sleep.” Baekhyun says, grabbing the blanket once again.

Sehun sighs and finally switches off the light, before he gets on the couch next to the other.

“It will be fine.” he rubs his friend’s shoulders, coming closer to him until their backs stick together.

For some odd reason, even at this proximity, Baekhyun doesn’t feel anything, not even a slight tingle of excitement because he is so close to another (extremely sexy) body. But things are drastically changing when he is either near Kyungsoo or his math teacher.

“Night…” Sehun says, nuzzling at Baekhyun’s nape.

“You are a leech!” Baekhyun laughs, but in all honesty, he has never minded the other’s leech like tendencies.

“Aham…” Sehun mumbles.

“Make space.” Jongdae shouts, breaking the comfortable silence.

“Fuck off!” Sehun scream whispers.

“Kyungsoo shut the door in my face. So make room.” Jongdae says, nudging Sehun with his knee.

“I’ll shut the couch in your face…” the guy says but nonetheless, pushes Baekhyun until there is some space at the edge of the couch.

“This is crap. I’m not even tired anymore.” Jongdae hits the pillow with his fist.

“Shut up.” Baekhyun whispers.

“I can’t actually believe that you and Kyungsoo-”

“Just shut up!” Baekhyun and Sehun say at unison.

“You know what we needed today? Booze.” Jongdae whispers and receives a kick in the belly from his brother.

When the morning comes, Baekhyun feels uncomfortably squished with the face into the couch, with an extremely warm body pressed to his that is also breathing hot breath exactly in his ear.

The alarm goes off in the same exact moment, making Jongdae jump in his sleep and kick Sehun in the butt with his knees. Like a never ending circle of unfortunate events, the guy is being pushed forward, until Baekhyun is left out of air in his lungs (and also without any personal space).

He rashly pushes Sehun off of him and throws the blanket aside, before he begins his journey of crawling on top of both of them to finally reach the floor.

“That was my kidney…” Jongdae mumbles.

“The kidney is not there.” Baekhyun says, finally stepping on the carpet.

He looks around and sighs when he notices that Kyungsoo is nowhere to be seen.

_Maybe he already left_

But his wishes are not granted, because a brown tuff of hair appears in the doorframe of the living room. Baekhyun looks down and suddenly realizes that he is still wearing just his Marvel boxers and large t-shirt. He glances at the other and his ears are again beginning their journey of being set on fire.

“Mooooorning!!” he says, too loud and in a too thin voice, because Sehun curses him from his sleep.

Kyungsoo only offers him a tight smile and quickly turns his back to walk into the kitchen.

“Come on, wake up you two!” Baekhyun says, vigorously shaking Jongdae and Sehun who only mumble in their sleep.

Finally, the elder throws the blanket away and not so gently (or caringly) pushes his brother until he falls straight on the carpet with an extremely loud thud.

“Fuuuuck, you fucking moron!” Jongdae screams, rubbing his back.

“Morning to you too.” Sehun greets, smirking at the other who throws flaming carrots with his eyes.

Baekhyun smiles at him and then enters the kitchen where Kyungsoo is already standing at the table, preparing some sandwiches.

Rapidly, the boy comes and tightly hugs the other from behind, making him jump in surprise and punch Baekhyun in the belly with the handle of the knife. The latter shrieks away, grimacing in pain as Kyungsoo doesn’t even give him a second glance.

On the other hand, Jongdae shares a rather amused glance with Sehun.

“What was that for?” Baekhyun asks, coming closer to Kyungsoo and staring exactly at his face (and trying not to look at those heart shaped lips).

“You are an idiot.” Kyungsoo says, placing a neatly made sandwich in front of the boy. “Eat. And shut up.”

“Couple problems.” Jongdae giggles and gets a stare from Kyungsoo. “Or not.”

Because when they leave for school Kyungsoo is still sullen and Baekhyun still overly energetic, and somehow they don’t talk to each other, only to Jongdae.

And when they enter the high school, Kyungsoo sprints to his first class that it is common with Baekhyun’s, leaving the two of them without any other word.

“You’ve fucked it up.” Jongdae says, patting Baekhyun’s back.

“Shut up. It’s just his usual state.” Baekhyun says, knowing that he is already 5 minutes late to the math class, but he doesn’t even bother to move from the middle of the hallway.

“If you say so, Romeo.” Jongdae laughs and throws a chunk of the scarf Baekhyun is wearing over his head.

He stays like this, looking through it at the boy who is getting smaller and smaller in the distance until he cannot distinguish him from a lint.

Just for one second, he closes his eyes, and when he opens them, Mr. Park is standing in front of him, blurred out because of the scarf.

The man looks at him for some moments, before he gingerly grabs the edges of the scarf, as Baekhyun is looking up at him with big eyes, and he slowly lifts it to uncover his face that is becoming rosier and blotchier, while the man’s gaze is on him.

“Tadaaaaa!” he loudly says, placing his hands underneath the chin and grinning at the elder.

“Morning…” he smiles.

“Morning…” Baekhyun says, his grin extending (as much as his blush) to his ears.

The man coughs and takes a few steps back.

“You are late.”

“And so are you.” Baekhyun says.

“I’ll see you after classes, for tutoring, right?” Mr. Park asked with a smile.

“Yes…” Baekhyun says, pouting and looking up at him with big eyes.

For some strange reason, he still feels his heart beating too fast and his cheeks burning too much.

“We could also talk…if you want, of course…” he says, brushing his fingers over Baekhyun’s arm.

“Yeah-of course-whatever…” Baekhyun mumbles, looking down at the other’s hand.

“Baekhyun…” Mr. Park says, raising one eyebrow.

“I said YES.” he says a little too loud.

"Prove to me that I can trust you.” he says and with that, opens the door to the classroom and disappears from Baekhyun’s sight.

The boy sighs, staring at the closed door and finally, twists the knob and enters too.  

“Mooooooorning, peeps!” he yells with a huge grin on his face. “The Byun Terminator has-”

“Sit down, Baekhyun!” the man says with a frown.

He walks straight to the back of the room, trying not to look into Kyungsoo’s direction, who is standing in the first row.

“You are pissing him off…” the guy next to him laughs and Baekhyun laughs too, but nervously scratches a stain on the desk.

“Well…who then?” he asks, huffing a half laugh that dies in his throat.

So, when the class ends, he waits in his seat for Kyungsoo to leave the room, but he doesn’t, because he looks back at him and waits. He tries to glance somewhere else, but he cannot and finally, stands up to walk up to him, even though he feels like running in the opposite direction.

Kyungsoo smiles, leaning on the desk behind him and shakes his head with the same strange smile on his lips.

“This is…” he trails, poking something with his shoe, “it even feels awkward to talk to you. I can’t talk to you, actually.” Kyungsoo continues, licking his lips.

“What are you talking about?!” Baekhyun says loudly, punching the other in the arm. “Of course we talk. We are talking right now.” he laughs, punching him one more time.

“Baekhyun…”

“We are FANTASTIC. Like always.” Baekhyun says with a chest tight and breath caught in his throat.

His thoughts are melting together, swirling around with no purpose and he feels like only laughing and laughing.

“Baekhyun…I-we kissed and-”

“It didn’t mean a thing right?! Right?!” Baekhyun throws his arms in the air, smiling brightly, but without any joy in it. “We are not in a stupid rom-com where the two best friends turn gay for each other. It was…just for fun.” Baekhyun punches him one more time.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m not even…gay. I’m not. I don’t like guys. I-we only experimented. It meant nothing.” Kyungsoo says, walking further away from Baekhyun. “I’m-you know-I’m late for class.” he says, smiling one more time before he exits the classroom.

Baekhyun sighs, but doesn’t stay any longer in there, but walks out where there’s noise and he’s not so alone.

He laughs once more-“heeeeey, duuuude! Nice snapback!” he yells at a taller guy who has just passed by him.

“Baeek!” the other turns around to shake his hand. “Still just as noisy!”

“And you still just as…you. TaeTae!!” he grins, still holding the other’s hand. “I thought your high school was…a couple of blocks away.”

“Changed schools. Better air over here!” Taehyung smiles, finally letting go of the boy’s hand. “I would invite you to my show on "Romeo and Juliette” but I know you would fall asleep.“ he says, scratching his head. "See you around.”

“Of couuuuurse!!” Baekhyun makes a small reverence before the other turns around to leave.

Baekhyun and Taehyun have unexpectedly met at a school play, when a bored Byun Baekhyun was made by his English Literature teacher go with his class and watch “something”, since he doesn’t even remember the name of it. And somehow, his seat was right next to Taehyung’s and 10 minutes and 34 seconds after the show started, he was already sleeping onto the other’s shoulder.

But Baekhyun wouldn’t say they clicked in the way he has had with Kyungsoo, at first shoe touch and cry of pain in his backyard.

_Fuck…_

Because ever since they’ve decided, through whatever joke played by the providence, that they would be friends, Baekhyun has always had some weird butterflies whenever Kyungsoo was more than cold and friendly-friendly with him, but real and warm and there.

But, coming back to the present day, he does afterwards what he knows best: waits for the classes to be over so that he would finally go home. He doesn’t have the chance though, because right when the bell rings for the seventh class, he enters once again the _room of torture_ , where Mr. Park is already standing at the front desk.

Baekhyun coughs and sits down next to him.

“Are you alright?” he asks.

“Yes.” Baekhyun smiles brightly.

“Okay. Let’s do some math, then.”

And after 2 hours, Baekhyun really thinks he did his best, or what he could when in all reality he hates the subject in front of him. He also likes to think that math hates him too, just to makes things feel more balanced.

“I’m glad that you tried. I really am. If you keep it like this, your grades will improve and your exam scores will be-”

“You don’t have to be nice about it.” Baekhyun says, suddenly feeling the tips of his ears catching on fire as his cheeks are turning pink.

The blood is rushing through his veins as he feels angry for whatever reason.

“I’m not. It’s the truth.”

“No, is isn’t. Maybe none of you think about it, but not everybody is meant to go to college. I’m not and I’ll never be smart enough for that. I don’t even want big scores in the exams. You are smart. I’m not. I don’t want to be some smart ass lawyer or business crap man or anything like that. What’s so wrong with not doing that??!! I hate school!“ Baekhyun says, rashly standing up.

"Baekhyun…please calm down. This is just the anger talking. Me and your mother don’t think that you are stupid or incapable of becoming something great in life. We-”

“Don’t say it just to say it. You don’t even care about me. You have no reason to.” Baekhyun says, suddenly feeling every little emotion leave his body and let him empty and ashamed of his outburst.

“I’m sorry…” he mumbles, looking down, throwing himself back onto the chair.

“Baekhyun…come here.” the man says, but he instead walks towards the boy and brings him into a tight embrace. “You’re alright. You’ll be alright. I trust and care about you.” he says and Baekhyu shudders in his arms. “You’ll be alright. You will.”

Baekhyun huffs, feeling more and more ashamed underneath the weight of the thoughts he has never voiced before.

“I’ll drive you home…it’s raining.” the man says, looking out the window.

Baekhyun only nods and follows him outside of the school in total silence, even when they reach the black car and it’s pouring all over them, or when they both sit inside and the windshields are brushing the drops away.

“You know, when I was 19, all I wanted to do was play the guitar and go to parties.” Mr. Park smiles and looks at Baekhyun, whose head is leaning on the cold glass.

“I had never thought that I’d become a math teacher-” he laughs, rubbing his upper lip-“but my parents were both in the field, my father even working at the university. So they pushed me to do it since I was just as lost as you are.”

Baekhyun finally looks at him and only sighs, squeezing his lips tight together.

“And do you like it? Teaching?” the boy asks.

“Yes. I actually do and it came as a surprise to me, when I first started out. What I’m trying to say is that you never know until you try. You got to try and not give up so easily.”

“Wow. Emotional speech over here.” Baekhyun huffs.

“Baekhyun…you don’t need to be condescending. I know how it feels-”

“No, you don’t! You fucking don’t!” he hits the door with his fist. “I don’t even know how I feel…so how the fuck would you know?! I haven’t even told my mother. Or to my fucking so called best friend. I can’t even talk to him anymore because I managed to screw things up so easily and I have no fucking idea why I’m telling you all of this when it’s so clear that…that…” he trails but jumps in the seat when he feels the other’s hand cover his.

It is warm and soft and somehow reassuring. He barely notices that the car has stopped, in front of his house and the windshields are not brushing the rain away anymore.

“You’re right. I don’t know how you are feeling.” Mr. Park says. “I don’t, but I’m glad you trust me enough to tell me all of this. I trust you, Baekhyun, I really do.” the man continues and the boy smiles, coming a little bit closer to the elder.

“I don’t even know you…really. You are Mr. Park, my math teacher, but that’s it. And you now obviously know a crap ton about me…” Baekhyun says, smiling and feeling calmer, if not totally ashamed.

“Well…I’m not certain how appropriate this really is but…there’s a Chinese restaurant around the corner…” the man says and finally looks down at his hand, which is still over the boy’s, and he removes it.

“I’m starving. You know, yelling your problems truly makes you hungry.” Baekhyun laughs, his eyes two half-moons that look at the other.

“Alright. And we can talk there.” Mr. Park says.

They actually cannot find a parking spot near the restaurant, so the man has to turn around and park it on the other side of the road, right in front of the place. It’s still pouring when they exit the car, and Baekhyun can feel his cheeks explode from how much he has been smiling, running next to the other to the restaurant.

Mr. Park opens the door and lets Baekhyun walk in first.

“I want noodles with spring rolls.“ Baekhyun says.

"Then we’ll get noodles and spring rolls.” the man says, gently rubbing his back.

And so, after 5 minutes, they are both sitting at a table, stuffing their mouths (when they can actually properly use the chopsticks) with food.

“This is so goood.” Baekhyun says with a mouthful.

Mr. Park laughs and Baekhyun thinks it suits him, smiling and being happy. It makes him look young and carefree, adding to his features some sort of kindness.

“You’ve finished it already?” the man asks with a laugh.

Baekhyun nods and quickly, steals some noodles from the other’s plate. He shoves them in his mouth with a pleased grin while the other is protecting (like a mother his child) whatever is left from his food. Which is not much.

“So…what do you want to know?” Mr. Park asks, putting the plate aside.

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Baekhyun…” he laughs “blue.”

“I have an idea. You say something true about you and I say something true about me. No questions…just being honest…” Baekhyn says, looking down at the table as he’s fidgeting with the tissue in front of him.

“Okay.” he coughs “I wanted to become a popstar when I was your age and I even went to some auditions until my parents caught up on that. Now, your turn.”

“I’m scared…because I’m a failure.” Baekhyun says.

“You are not one. You-”

“Say something else about you. Please…” the boy says, looking up at him.

“I’m…I’m in a 3 years relationship with someone-someone I don’t love anymore.” Mr. Park says, huffing and looking down at the torn piece of paper in his hands.  

Baekhyun looks too, and then at his face and cannot help but feel the pang of jealousy ripping through his heart, even though he knows he has no reason to.

“How is love supposed to feel like?” he asks, averting his gaze.

The man smiles and laughs quickly, ripping further part the pieces of paper in his hands.

“Weren’t you supposed to say something about you now?” he laughs.

“Change of rules?”

“Baek…” Mr. Park says and Baekhyun is surprised that the other called him this way.

They stay in silence, looking from time to time at one another until Baelkhyun finally bursts out in laughter, followed by the man.

“Are you in love?” he asks, with tears in his eyes that he’s quickly wiping away.

“I don’t know…” Baekhyun laughs. “Is it supposed to hurt?”

“I’m not the best person to ask questions about love…I suck at it, as you can see…” he looks down, shaking his head.

“Then…why don’t you break up with…that persons if you’re hurt? If it hurts you?” Baekhyun asks, feeling as if he’s stepping out of safe territory and quickly walking into mined and unstable one.

“Guilt?” he looks up at him out of the blue. “She’s always been there for me, always. Sacrificed so many things and I cannot be the jerk who breaks her heart because he is suddenly out of love.” he says, continuing to shake his head and smile without happiness in it. Only bitterness.

“Mr. Park…”

“Call me Chanyeol. Right now Mr. Park sounds…wrong.” Chanyeol laughs.

“Chanyeol…” Baekhyun trails off and the other lightly touches his hand, before he just as quickly removes it as if it burned him.

“I should-you should go home…it’s getting late and your parents will wonder why the tutoring-”

“Okay.” Baekhyun says and quickly stands up. “Thanks for the talk…”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah…I just need to go home. I’ll see you at school, I guess.” Baekhyun says and opens the door of the restaurant without looking back, stepping into the still pouring rain.

It’s cold on his skin, soaking his clothes as he’s running until he reaches his house and opens the front door.

“Baekhyun. Hey, kiddo!” the person in the hallway greets him with a surprised expression on his face.

“Weren’t you supposed to be gone?” the boy asks, still standing in the whip of the water.

“Kiddo…I came to take some more stuff and…” he grins, patting his shoulder with his big hand. “Come on in. You’ll get sick if you stand like that.”

“No. Why the fuck would you come here when you left us?!” Baekhyun yells, gripping the wood of the door with his fingers, his knuckles turning white.

“Baekhyun…you are my son. Of course I want to see my son.” the man laughs, walking closer to the boy who takes a few steps back, on the small path.

“Bullshit! Bullshit!” Baekhyun spats out, feeling his eyes burn. “When you leave your family for a cunt-”

“Don’t you dare use that word in front of-”

“Because what?! What?! You’re going to do what?! Cunt. Cunt. Cunt. She’s just a cunt. Cuh-” and then, Baekhyun feels a pang of pain seeping through his flesh, the skin of his cheek taking the red shape of those fingers, a burning sensation taking control of his face as tears are trickling down his face.

“Baekhyun, Baekhyun-I didn’t mean to-”

“Fuck off!! Fuck youu! I wish you were dead! I wish you were dead!!” Baekhyun yells, running through the rain and running until his lungs feel like they caught on fire, until he finally stops and falls on the sidewalk drenched, with tears falling down his face, shuddering with each cry.

He picks up the phone with shaky fingers and dials a number.

“Can-can you come and pick me up…please? Chanyeol…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments, feedback and opinions are well loved <3


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll start writing shorter chapters from now on, since they are easier to edit (which means I'll be much happier with the outcome)  
> On another note, I hope the baekyeol relationship is advancing and they have some sort of dynamic, or at least (sexual) tension. I feel like story has dragged for the past few chapters, but at the same time, it also helped to develop the characters better (I hope).  
> I really wanted to introduce for a while a new female character (with a more prominent role in the story), so this was a nice opportunity for me.
> 
> enjoy :)

The rain is hitting Baekhyun’s head like millions of damp and sad baby carrots that have nothing better to do than fall from the sky. Because this is normal.

And nobody ever said that, but it doesn’t matter.

So, he keeps on waiting, drenched and cold to his skin, but unwilling to move one step further, not even underneath the porch of a nearby house. He has his chin pressed on the palms of his hands, looking in the distance for a black Sedan that it’s rather not coming, since the street is empty and almost quiet, if we exclude the rain.

_Fuck…I’ll freeze here to death._

He is still wandering what actually made him take the surprising decision of calling his math teacher instead of running to Kyungsoo’s house, as he has always done since the (almost) first day he met him, 14 years ago. The other has been for him a constant in his life, the forever grumpy and seemingly unpleasant friend that is a too good of a cook (for his own sake), and an even better hugger (when he actually wants).

Baekhyun sighs, looking back at his friend’s house, covered in thick shadows, only a dim light illuminating the window at the first floor. Kyungsoo’s bedroom. He gulps down and averts his gaze, as if he is afraid that he can be seen by the other, and then, two headlights almost blind him.

The black Sedan!

Quickly and rather clumsily, Chanyeol opens the door and gets out of the vehicle, almost tripping on the edge of the sidewalk.

“Baekhyun! Why the heck are you standing in the rain?!” he asks, placing his hands on his hips as he rapidly gets soaked to the skin, the white shirt sticking to (every muscle of) his body.

The boy smiles, unconsciously putting the hand on his still reddened cheek, but not before the other notices and comes closer.

“What happened to you?” Chanyeol asks, crouching down next to him and rashly removing his fingers. “Baek…”

Baekhyun looks up at him, and even sitting like this, the elder is by a few centimeters taller than him. He tries to smile, but looks down instead, at his hand still in the other’s warm one.

The rain is pouring over them and the alarm for a car sets off as a thunder breaks the silence.

“It’s nothing.” he says, chewing on his bottom lip.

“Yes, it is.” Chanyeol says, standing next to him on the sidewalk, still holding his cold hand. “We’ll get sick.” he continues, but he says it with a glint in his eyes.

“Less school for us.” Baekhyun laughs.

He stares down, at how small his fingers look next to Chanyeol’s, and in a heartbeat, he intertwines them with the man’s. Slowly, he looks up, with a tinge of blush on his already pink face, at the other, who doesn’t make any motion to break their hands apart.  

Their gazes meet for a short while, but Baekhyun is the first to bring it back to the ground.

“Tell me…please.” Chanyeol says and Baekhyun has the impression that the grip has tightened for a second, but maybe it’s just his hands lightly trembling from the cold.

“My father slapped me because I called his girlfriend a cunt.” he huffs, shoulders shuddering and becoming smaller under an invisible weight.

Chanyeol sighs, remaining silent. At first, Baekhyun starts shaking lightly, but after a couple more seconds, it turns into consistent trembling.

“You are freezing.” Chanyeol says, suddenly coming to his feet and bringing the boy up with him. “You should go-”

“I don’t want to go home.” Baekhyun shakes his head.

“Baekhyun…it wouldn’t be-”

“Please…just for half an hour. I shouldn’t have called you. I’m-”

“Stop apologizing to me.” Chanyeol says, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him until Baekhyun loses his balance and falls on the other’s chest. “Baek…” he whispers, tightly wrapping his arms around the boy’s think body. “Baek…” he says one more time, but there comes no answer.

With quick movements, the man opens the passenger’s door and carefully places the boy inside on the seat. Just as rapidly, he starts the engine with trembling fingers, looking from time to time at Baekhyun.

“Fuck! Fuck! I’m an idiot. How could I let him stay in the rain…Crap! He might even get pneumonia!” Chanyeol says, shivering himself and pushing the gas pedal to the bottom.

The heating is turned to a maximum and Baekhyun quietly fidgets on the seat next to him, as his teeth are chattering from time to time and body shaking uncontrollably.

“Should I bring you to the hospital?” Chanyeol says more to himself than anything, but Baekhyun shakes his head in response, mumbling a weak  _no_.

After 15 minutes and some seconds, the engine of the car stops in front of a block of flats and Chanyeol quickly opens Baekhyun’s door to help him get out. It’s still raining, but it’s so dark outside that it is difficult to see the rain drops that are falling down.

“I’m okay…” Baekhyun weakly smiles, but just to disprove his point, he trips on something, losing balance, so Chanyeol wraps an arm around his middle, bringing him close to his body.

“I’m so sorry…I’m a moron…” Chanyeol whispers, leading the boy to the entrance, kicking the door with his foot and rapidly inserting themselves into the dark hallway.

Fortunately (for both of them), the apartment is only at the first floor and Chanyeol finds the keyhole from the first try.

“It’s a mess. But-” he huffs, turning on the lights-“you need a hot shower.” he says, kicking the door close.

“You are freezing too…” Baekhyun says, touching the drenched shirt that sticks to the other’s chest.

“I’m okay-you are not.” he says, pushing him towards the room in the back. “You-I mean-I’ll find some dry clothes for you as you shower and-the bathroom.” Chanyeol coughs, opening the door. “Do you need-”

“I know how to use a shower.” Baekhyun smiles, but rather quickly closes the door after him.

Looking around the small bathroom for a couple of seconds, he finally turns on the water and removes in a hurry the clothes that have stuck to his body, throwing them on the floor and (at the speed of a flying carrot), he jumps into the shower.

The water, even at the lowest setting, almost feels too hot on his cold skin, but after 15 minutes of shivering and (checking for any frost bites) cursing, he considers that he has finally come to a decent body temperature. Something over 37 degrees Celsius.

When he looks at the towel rack, he notices that there are only 2 towels, and the first thought that sparks in his mind is that the one tightly wrapped around his torso might have been used by Chanyeol.

_Stop thinking about none sense. Is it like indirect kissing but for lower regions? Stop with it…_

When he opens the door, the hallway is empty and quiet, and for a moment, he feels disoriented, having the need to touch the wall behind him to stabilize himself. But then, Chanyeol walks to him from the room next to bathroom, with a timid smile on his lips and a bunch of black clothes in his hands.

“You should shower too…I don’t want to attend your funeral…” Baekhyun giggles, taking the garments from the other.

“Are you okay?” Chanyeol asks.

Baekhyun nods and suddenly (without thinking that much, actually) jumps into the man’s arms, tangling himself around his body and hiding his face in the crook of his neck. Only 3 seconds later does he realize that he’s only wearing a towel, wrapped around his middle, which can unwrap at every moment, leaving him naked in front of his math teacher.

Chanyeol laughs, loud and joyful as he drapes both arms around Baekhyun’s thin frame, bringing him even closer to his body.

“You are heavier than you seem.” he giggles and Baekhyun rubs his nose onto Chanyeol’s neck, which smells like fresh rain and soap.

“I’m happy like this…” Baekhyun whispers, with the heart pressed tightly onto the man’s, beating so fast with all the adrenaline surging through his veins. It might even be from the slap or the cold rain and too hot shower, the warmth and happiness that the boy feels.

“You make me happy…” he whispers, finally jumping back to the floor, but keeping the same unreasonable distance between their bodies.

“Baekhyun…” Chanyeol says, rapidly taking a step back that feels like too many in Baekhyun’s mind. Because it isn’t supposed to happen like this. Or feel this way.

Suddenly, his heart is not beating just as fast as before or the adrenaline pumping just as much. Maybe only his cheeks are dully aching and his limbs are hurting as the water is dripping off of him.

Now, it’s Baekhyun’s turn to take a few steps back, until he is touching the wall behind him.

“I was just kidding.” he laughs, waving around the t-shirt that seemingly remained in his hand.

“Baekhyun…this-”

“I was kidding. I’m tired and half dead, do you actually expect me to say normal shit?” he laughs, placing the hands on the hips.

Chanyeol takes a step towards him, but unfortunately, the boy has nowhere else to go.

“Sorry…I shouldn’t have called you. I wasn’t thinking. I’ll-I’ll just get dressed and go home. This is so stupid.” Baekhyun says, turning around and then back round.

“Stop apologizing. Stop using this mask around me…” Chanyeol says, taking another step.

“This is the real me.” Baekhyun says. “I should get dressed.” he continues, suddenly aware that he is only wearing a towel.

“Baekhyun…”

But Baekhyun doesn’t look at him anymore, only somewhere on the floor, before he attempts to put on the too large t-shirt.

“You’re still freezing and wet.” Baekhyun says, scrunching his lips in a thin line.

“Okay…but we need to talk, after I get out of the shower.” Chanyeol says, looking one more time at the other, before he enters the bathroom.

Baekhyun sighs the moment the door closes after him and throws the clothes on the floor, with him sitting on top of them, like a king over a pile of rubbish.

His cheeks only now are beginning to burn, thinking about the indirect rejection he felt from the other, as he took just one step back.

_Idiot_

He finally stands up and removes the towel from around his waist, letting it drop to the floor, in front of him. Rather quickly, he dresses with what Chanyeol gave him (everything too big and large for his thin frame), when the front door opens and a woman that seems around the man’s age steps into the apartment.

Baekhyun jumps in surprise, even though there’s nothing to be surprised about, and the woman too, dropping the umbrella to the ground.

“Who are you?” she asks, clutching the doorknob with her long and thin fingers.

“Baekhyun. I mean Byun Baekhyun. Mr. Park…I mean-I was drenched and Mr. Park brought me to his house to-dry clothes?” he points towards himself, dumbly smiling at her, as he even more realizes how pathetic he must look dressed like this.

“Oh…” her small mouth makes a perfect circles as her hand falls next to her body. “I see…and where’s Chanyeol?” she asks, still not leaving her spot, halfway inside and halfway in the hallway.

“Taking a shower?” Baekhyun almost asks, shifting from one foot to another.

_So she is his girlfriend. Fuck. She’s pretty_

“I’m Rosé.” she says with a small smile.

“And I’m just leaving.” Baekhyun says when he hears that the water has just stopped.

“Are you sure?” she asks, but Baekhyun only nods, rashly putting on the wet snickers (without even tying them) and passes by her exactly when the bathroom door opens. Chanyeol steps into the main hallway with the sweats already on him and his chest dripping wet, when Rosé closes the front door.

“Rosé?!” the man asks, arching an eyebrow, and looking around in surprise.

“If you’re looking for Baekhyun, he has just left.” she says, taking off the black leather boots.

“Why did he-”

“He seemed scared and embarrassed… Is everything alright? You never take students home.” she says, stepping towards him with a slight frown on her face.

“It’s a long story…but he was freezing in the rain.” he says, wrapping an arm around her middle as she leaves a small kiss on the corner of his mouth.

For some reason, this reminds him of the way Baekhyun hugged him, of how small and fragile he felt in his arms. How warm and strangely giddy he felt when Baekhyun’s breath was hitting his neck.

“What are you thinking about?” she asks, smiling and trying to look into his eyes, but Chanyeol is staring somewhere behind her.

“Nothing.” he laughs, leaning the forehead onto hers. She still smells like roses, and when he breaths the scent in, he instantly feels calmer, but guiltier at the same time.

“Does this nothing have a name?” she asks, raising an eyebrow, but kisses him on the lips nonetheless.

“I should go get a shirt. I’m cold.” he says, stepping back from her arms.

“Or…not.” she pulls the elastic band of his sweats and lets it fall back, with a slap. “You don’t need them for…other things.” Rosé smirks, biting her lower lip.

“I should get dressed. I have a crap ton of tests to grade.” he coughs, rapidly walking into the bedroom, as she pushes the tips of her fingernails in the palm of her hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are loved <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Took me quite a while to finish editing this chapter (because I'm lazy), but here it is. 
> 
> enjoy:)

“Fuck this fucking weather!” Baekhyun yells as he kicks the front door with his foot, causing it to hit the wall and then rapidly go back into place, almost right in his face.

“Fuck!” he opens it with more caution this time, and steps into the rain that is only lightly pouring right now; nonetheless, the boy starts shivering almost immediately, bracing his body with both hands.

Happily, as in the only good thing happening the entire day, the bus stop is literally around the corner and even better, the right one comes just in time, only after 23 seconds of waiting.

He sits down on one of the many free seats and on impulse, he dials a number that he knows by heart at this point. Quickly, he presses cancel at the realization that the one he is calling is Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo, that person who hasn’t changed the number in the 6 years, as the device evolved from a blue flip phone (that Baekhyun was rather envious of) to just an ancient I Phone model that people used to have 10 years back.  

Staring through the dirty window, he thinks he needs to tell someone about what happened with Chanyeol, or at least stop thinking about the blatant rejection he felt. But, he finally considers that complaining to someone would be of much more use than anything else.

_I could call Jongdae…but he’ll only mock me. And then there’s Sehun…but…_

But he truly only feels like talking to Kyungsoo, like he has always been doing in moments like this. Not necessarily talking about anything in particular, but just knowing that the other is right there, caring in his own way about him.

So, when Baekhyun jumps out of the bus, the rain has finally stopped and the sky is somewhat clear. As clear as it can look at 7’o’clock on a Tuesday night. And there are no moon and stars, since it is too early for that. Duh.

He runs to the closest convenience shop and buys (an unhealthy amount of) beer and some pretzels and chips, with a huge grin on his face. Just as rapidly, he sees himself knocking at Kyungsoo’s door, still smiling for whatever reason (and frantically knocking, without even taking a break).

“You will break it!!” Kyungsoo says when he opens the door with a frown on his face. “You are lucky my folks aren’t home.” he continues, standing in the same spot, as Baekhyun dangles the shopping bag from one hand to another.

“Food. And booze. As a sign of peace.” Baekhyun says, pushing the bags into the other’s arms.

“Did you rob the shop?” Kyungsoo laughs, peaking inside and laughing some more.

“Something like that…” Baekhyun’s smile falters. “I’m sorry?” he places the hands in the pockets of the sweats that threat to fall to his knees at every second.

“Me too…we are stupid. I mean, you are stupid, I’m just-” Kyungsoo shrugs, looking somewhere behind Baekhyun.

He finally drops the shopping bags to the floor, right behind him and Baekhyun thinks he heard a cracking sound.

“I can’t lose you…from stupid shit. You are idiotic enough for-I mean-I want my best friend back.” Kyungsoo coughs, finally looking into Baekhyun’s eyes.

Once again this day, he jumps into someone else’s arms. This time, Kyungsoo is the one as he steps backwards (exactly on the bags) to regain balance, as the boy is hugging him even tighter.

“I think I might have cracked something…” Kyungsoo laughs into Baekhyun’s shirt. “Where did you find these clothes? In the 5 size too large bin?” he continues, leaning the chin on his shoulder.

“Something like that…” Baekhyun hums, remembering the embrace with Chanyeol, how warm and protected he felt next to him, before everything broke apart.

“Now, get out.” Kyungsoo says with a (trying to be) serious mine, stepping away from Baekhyun (back on the shopping bags).

Kyungsoo finally gives them a not too gentle kick with his foot, but pretends as if nothing happened. Both of them stare at each other for a couple of seconds without saying anything, but ultimately, they both burst out in laughter and Baekhyun eventually walks into the house.

“So…what’s the plan?” Kyungsoo asks, climbing the stairs with the bags in his hands.

Baekhyun shrugs the question off and runs after him, to his room and jumps on the neatly made bed.

“Do you think that Chanyeol-I mean, Mr. Park might actually like-like me?” Baekhyun asks the first thing that bugging his mind.

“Wow. Now it’s Chanyeol…” Kyungsoo laughs, displaying the beer cans on the desk. “10! What were you thinking?!”

“I wasn’t!” Baekhyun laughs.

“Are you ever doing that?” he asks, and opens a can that he gives him.

“But what do you think?” Baekhyun sips from the beer (for some long seconds) and Kyungsoo stares at him with big eyes.

“That you shouldn’t do anything.” Kyungsoo says, sitting on the chair. “It’s halfway illegal.”

“I’m 19!!” Baekhyun whines.

“And he’s 27 and your teacher since you were 16.” Kyungsoo sips from his beer too, moderately, and places it on a folded napkin on the desk.

“I can feel it.”

“What? Your mind exploding from so much intelligence? I’m amazed you still have your head on your shoulders.” Kyungsoo says, taking another small sip.

“Haha.”

“Do you actually know anything about him? And don’t start with ‘he’s hot’.” Kyungsoo says, raising an eyebrow and smirking, as if he knew he caught the other unprepared.

Baekhyun shifts on the bed, taking one last gulp from the can and then he throws it (without much precision) into the garbage can. It lands right next to it and few drops fall right on the cream carpet. Useless to say is that Kyungsoo turned halfway red when he saw the small apocalypse, and immediately rushed to the bathroom to grab a wet cloth. In a record time of 5 minutes, the stains were gone, but also Baekhyun’s chances of drinking more beer since Kyungsoo somehow managed to hide them from him.

“You freaking traitor!” Baekhyun says.

“If you tell me 10 things you know about him, I’ll give you a can.” Kyungsoo smirks, standing down next to the other.

“That’s not fair!”

“So you admit that you know shit about-”

“He has a girlfriend and her name is Rosé.” Baekhyun almost yells, covering his friend’s mouth with his hand. “He doesn’t love her anymore. He knows how to play guitar and his parents made him become a teacher because they were also teachers.” he says with a victorious smile. “Ha!!” he shouts, but in the exact moment, Kyungsoo bites the palm of his hand, making him jump and yell in pain, as blood is rushing in the indentations left on the skin.

“Still not enough.” Kyungsoo says, rubbing a tissue over his lips.

“You act as if you didn’t have your tongue down my throat the other day!” Baekhyun says, but immediately puts both hands over his mouth.

Kyungsoo stops from whatever he is doing and stares down at his hands, hardly gulping down, probably the knot in his throat.

“I didn’t mean…that.”

“It’s fine.” Kyungsoo says, smiling weakly.

“We haven’t really talked about it…” Baekhyun says, looking up at him, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

Kyugsoo falls back on his chair, sighing, almost exasperatedly. “I was curious. Okay?”

“About what?!”

“If I like…why does it matter?!” Kyungsoo snaps, standing up and turning around to look through the window.

“Why can’t you ever be open with me?”

“And you are?” Kyungsoo rashly turns around, staring straight into Baekhyun’s eyes.

“I like Chanyeol and I like you, but just as a friend. The last couple of days were crap because of some stupid kisses. I want things to go back to normal.” Baekhyun says, feeling awfully small underneath Kyungsoo’s gaze.

“You only like him because he’s older and hot. You don’t even know him.” Kyungsoo lifts his arms into the air and lets them fall back on his hips.

“Are you actually jealous?” Baekhyun asks, suddenly bursting out in laughter.

“Stop it.” Kyungsoo says between clenched teeth, hitting the other in this shins. “You think that’s funny?” he asks, slapping him over the head.

“I’ll stop, I’ll stop!” Baekhyun says, but doesn’t, so Kyungsoo slaps him over the shoulder a couple more times until the boy finally stops. “I’m just surprised…”

“I’m not jealous and I don’t fucking like you, so shut your mouth.” Kyungsoo says, sitting down with a huff.

“Well…if you do like me-”

“I told you to shut up.” Kyungsoo says, trying to keep his cool, but after all, he bursts out in laughter, because in all those 14 years, he could never stay mad at the other for too long.

“Look. I still don’t agree with you being head over heels in loh-”

“Who said I am in love?” Baekhyun giggles.

“What I’m trying to say is that-” Kyungsoo sighs, looking around the room-“you won’t hear this from me anytime soon, but…I don’t want to ever lose you. I need you in my life, the idiot who always makes me smile. Happy?!” Kyungsoo raising an eyebrow, looking serious.

“Very.” Baekhyun smiles, jumping in his arms for the second time. “So…are we good?”

“Fabulous.” Kyungsoo says, patting his back. “Now get off of me.” he says, sounding a little bit strangled.

Baekhyun eventually does so, grinning brightly and feeling as if a weight was lifted off his chest.

“Are you already drunk?” Kyungsoo raises an eyebrow.

“Come on, give me another beer.” Baekhyun says, pouting at him.

“Fiine.”

A few hours passing, all the cans were scattered on the cream carpet, Kyungsoo not caring about it after the third one, when he was already more than tipsy (since his alcohol consumption tendencies were rather low in comparison to Baekhyun’s). Midnight finds them sitting on the ruffled bed, eyelids halfway closed, laughing at almost anything they are saying.

Baekhyun has the head on a pillow, whereas Kyungsoo is seated on Baekhyun’s lap, with the latter’s fingers slowly brushing through his hair.

“You actually peed yourself!!” Baekhyun laughs, with tears in his eyes.

“And you did too!” Kyungsoo giggles.

“Shut up!!” Kyungsoo slaps his thigh, receiving a kick in his back in return. “Fucker!” he mutters, but his voice is covered by the loud ringing tone of a phone.

Baekhyun’s.

“I’m too drunk for this shiiiiit!” Baekhyun drags out the words, staring at the device from the floor.

“Pick it up.” Kyungsoo nudges him in the ribs.

“Fine…fine.” Baekhyun says, trying to extend his arm to reach it, but the distance is too big so he somehow sideways crawls until he reaches the edge of the bed. Not even from this spot can he grab it, so he pushes himself even further, until he falls (with Kyungsoo) on the carpet.

“Moroon!” Kyungsoo laughs, looking like a starfish on sand.

“Yeeees?!” Baekhyun yells into the phone. “I can’t hear anything!!! Helllooooo?!!” he yells some more, to finally realize that he is actually talking to a black screen.

He clumsily unlocks the phone (at the 5th try) and calls the first number that appears.

“Who called?” Kyungsoo asks.

“Fuck knows!” Baekhyun laughs. “Helloooo…this is Byun Baek-mom!” he shouts with a huge grin. “Why would I go to the hospital?!” he laughs.

His smile doesn’t falter not even when he throws the phone next to him.

“What’s up?” Kyungsoo asks, standing up.

“Dad is in a coma. Can you believe it? Why would my dad be in a coma?” he asks, still laughing. “This is so so so weird.” he says, throwing himself on the bed. “So so weird.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be honest, I still enjoy the baeksoo dynamic and possibility of a relationship, but for the moment, I will focus more on baekyeol, esp. because I want to develop Chanyeol's character. 
> 
> Anyways, comments are appreciated :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still not happy with Chanyeol's character, but hopefully I'll managed to get it on the right track in the end.
> 
> enjoy:)

Byun Baekhyun couldn’t tell you when he woke up where he was. With his head and neck hurting as if he was run over by a tractor, sitting on an uncomfortable pale blue chair in a noisy hallway, with too much light hitting his face, he was feeling rather disoriented.

He couldn’t also tell why his lips felt like sandpaper or _why the fuck am I in here, for God’s sake?!_

But he was.

“Byun Baekhyun?” a woman dressed in a white uniform steps up to him.

“Yeah?” he blubbers out, rubbing his eyes.

“You can now see your father.” she says with a small smile that is supposed to be anything else but bored (which it is).

“Why?” he asks, bracing his body with both hands as a shiver runs through him. “I don’t get how the heck I woke up in…a hospital…” he says, mouth dropping a little bit as pieces of yesterday phone call are running through his mind. “My dad is in a coma? Why?”

“He was in a car accident, unfortunately.” she says. “Another driver hit his car and Miss. Graham was also-“

“Baekhyun.” a voice he knows too well says.

And then he sees his mother walking to him with an expression that he cannot yet decipher.

“Thank you, nurse. I will take care of him from now on.” she says and the other immediately leaves, giving the boy one more glance that seems for the most part relieved (he isn’t so sure he feels the same).

She crosses her arms across her chest, sighing deeply as Baekhyun can barely stand on his own two feet without the help of the wall or the chair (that almost falls on the floor).

“You are hangover.” she coldly says, looking at him, as her lips are tightly pressed together.

“I can tell, thank you very much.” he mutters, finally being able to stand up, but his head feels like it’s spinning with too many miles per hour.

“Kyungsoo brought you here and he was no better than you.” she says.

“I don’t freaking understand why his fucking girlfriend isn’t here for him. But instead, it’s us.” he says.

“Baekhyun…”

“I don’t want to see him. I don’t fucking care whether or not he lives or dies.” Baekhyun spats out, prolonging for a couple more seconds the letters in every word.

“You can’t say something like that. He is your father! Father, Baekhyun!” his mother says, raising her voice.

“I don’t care. I’m going home.” he says, turning around, realizing just as quickly that he doesn’t know where the exit is and that if he makes just another sudden movement he might puke his stomach out.

But he keeps on walking down the hallway, as it gets filled with people dressed in hospital robes and doctors, but he only sees them from the corner of his eyes, only as blurry shapes. Finally, he opens the big front doors and steps into the chilly morning air. He breaths it in and thinks that maybe the hangover is only a baby one.

Standing on a bench, underneath a big oak tree, there’s Kyungsoo, with the black hoodie with small, raised ears on his head.

Baekhyun slowly walks to sit right next to him with a sigh, placing his hands in the pockets of the sweats. The same clothes from yesterday, the ones Chanyeol gave him.

“It’s fucking cold.” he says, looking up at the grey sky.

“Here.” Kyungsoo says, handing him the same hoodie, but in a blue color. They bought them when they went together to Oslo, Kyungoo’s 3 days gift trip for his 18 birthday; Baekhyun kept on whining for 30 minutes in a store to buy matching hoodies and in any other aspects of their friendship, the other complied.

He takes it and quickly puts it on, rubbing his hands over his arms. Some leaves are flying through the air, falling right at their feet, all red and yellow, torn apart.

“Why did you bring me to the hospital?” he asks, pushing them with his shoe.

“He’s your father, for fuck’s sake. He might die.” Kyungsoo says, boring into his skull like a too old drill.

“I don’t care! I don’t. I don’t get why you and mom do, when he deserves exactly what has happened to him.” Baekhyun loudly says, kicking the asphalt with his foot.

He rashly stands up, in front of the other, shifting from one leg to another.

“I won’t argue with you.” Kyungsoo whispers, sighing.

“Don’t.” Baekhyun turns around and glances one more time at the sky. “You’ll be late for school.”

“You are not coming?” his friend asks, sitting up and walking towards him.

He chews on his bottom lip, being right behind his friend, looking smaller than usual as his shoulders are stooping.

“I’m taking a day off.” the boy laughs, turning around, being face to face with the other.

Kyungsoo flinches at the sudden movement, taking a small step backwards.

“I can take one too…if you want.” he smiles, but continues to chew on his bottom lip and stare down at the mud stain on his right snicker.

“I want to be alone.” Baekhyun says, patting his shoulder a little too forcefully and eagerly. “See ya!” he yells and starts running as he sees the bus arriving in the stop.

Kyungsoo watches him become smaller and smaller, running as clumsily as he has ever ran, his arms weirdly dangling in the air; a bad interpretation of some sort of Naruto. He huffs, smiling a little and sits back on the bench, feeling unsure of what he is supposed to do.

Baekhyun steps at the last minute into the vehicle, the doors catching between them the hem of the hoodie and as he tries to make another step, he hears a tearing sound. A piece of blue material falls onto the ground.

He looks back at it, but doesn’t bother to pick it up. Instead, he reaches for his phone, which surprisingly, is still in the front pocket of the sweats and picks it up to dial Sehun. Sehun, who most likely is sleeping right now, not even wanting or wishing for a phone call to wake him up in the middle of his own kind of night.

But it does wake him up and so, he groggily presses accept, without much in his head at this time in the morning.

“Whah-whattt?” he mumbles, yawning and pressing his head into the welcoming pillow.

“Let’s go bowling.” Baekhyun says, smiling to himself, hearing the other’s voice.

“It’s fucking 6 in the morning!” Sehun shouts into the phone, throwing it next to his head.

But Baekhyun doesn’t end the call, but patiently waits for the other to pick it up once again. He actually doesn’t really feel like being alone at all, or at least not alone with his thoughts or guilt.

“I’m not paying.” Sehun yawns, scratching his butt through the boxers.

“I’ll be there in 20.” Baekhyun smiles as he hears the other whine and curse on the other line.

And Baekhyun really arrives in front of his house in 21 minutes, just as Jongdae is opening the front door, looking rather gloomy and tired, with dark circles around his eyes.

“Well…I feel honored.” Jongdae laughs.

“I didn’t come for you.” Baekhyun smirks, passing by him, into the hallway.

“Hello!? Is this suddenly yours or what?” Jongdae turns around to look at him. “Aren’t you going to school?”

“Bowling. With Sehun.” Baekhyun says, climbing up the stairs.

“What the fuck, dude?! You skip school to hang out with that moron?!” Jongdae half laughs, half grunts.

“Yuuup!” Baekhyun yells, opening the door to the one’s in cause room. “Morning.” he chimes, jumping on the bed, exactly on top of Sehun"s body.

“Fuck…off!” he mumbles, trying to hit the other (but failing miserably).

“Wake up and let’s goooo.” Baekhyun slaps his butt.

Sehun kicks him with his foot, causing him to fall on his side on the bed.

“I'm not going bowling, so fuck off.”

But what Sehun doesn’t know in that moment is that 15 minutes later, on an empty stomach and a banana in his hand, he is running after a bus with Baekhyun right next to him. Because just like Kyungsoo, he cannot really refuse any of the boy’s wishes, especially when you have nothing better to do the entire day.

“You are insane!” he says, stepping into the bus.

“Thanks.”

“So what’s the deal with you?” Sehun asks, sitting down with a huff.

“Nothing. Hate school and I want to go bowling.” he says with a bright smile.

“Huh.” he says.

Baekhyun looks out of the window, and thinks for a moment that the man dressed in a blue coat, riding a bicycle is his father. He shakes his head, but the person has already disappeared from his sight.

“You hate bowling…” Sehun says, yawning some more.

Baekhyun turns around, as if he just woke up from a trance and he sees Sehun for the first time.

“You look pale…” Sehun trails off and Baekhyun can feels bile in his throat, as his mouth is beginning to water.

_No, no, no…_

He puts both hands around his mouth, pressing them tightly as his mouth fills with the bitter liquid.

“Fuck. Are you going to vomit? Tell me you are not going to vomit on a bus.” Sehun whispers, standing up and looking around with too big eyes.

To their luck, the vehicle is almost empty, except for other 2 passengers in the front of it. To their even greater luck, the door opens and Baekhyun sprints out, almost tripping on a stair, followed by a confused Sehun.

The boy crouches down next to a tree and immediately spits out the hot liquid in his mouth. His eyes are watering so badly, as his throat is aching.

“You okay?” Sehun asks, patting his back.

“Peachy. Just my usual-” he wipes his mouth-“morning vomit.”

He lets himself fall on the cold cement, feeling like a literal piece of shit, all sweaty (even though outside is cold) and grim.

“Let’s go home. You need to rest and crap.” Sehun says, crouching down next to him.

“I’m fine.” Baekhyun whispers.

_Kyungsoo would know what to-why do you think about him?_

Sehun wraps both arms around the other’s body, leaning his head on his shoulder.

“This is so disgusting and gay…” Baekhyun laughs, followed by Sehun. “But let’s go fucking bowling.” he continues, standing up with the other still attached to him.

They finally make it to the small shopping center in their equally small town, Morpeth, Northumberland, and Baekhyun only feels slightly dizzy and disgusting.

As they quickly find out, the actual sad and lonely bowling hall is closed for the day, even though on the handwritten piece of paper on the door it clearly states that Wednesday is open from 8 am till 8 pm.

“Crap.”

“You woke me for nothing.” Sehun says with a purse of his lips.

“Shut up. We are going to watch a movie instead.”

It turns out that the cinema opens at 10, so Sehun actually finds a long enough bench, and attempts to sleep on it for 2 hours while Baekhyun keeps nudging him in the ribs, keeps walking around and browsing his phone, too afraid to be alone with his thoughts.

Another man that passes by him looks this time like Chanyeol, dressed in one of his usual white shirts.

_I’m going insane_

But the 2 hours finally pass and Baekhyun chooses the least promising looking moving that he can find, paying for the tickets for the first time in his life (since Sehun has so casually forgot all his money at home).

“This is not fair.” Baekhyun whines, plopping himself on the red chair.

“You woke me up at 6.” Sehun whispers, since the room is dark and the commercials are rolling on the screen. “What’s up with you, though?”

“Nothing.” Baekhyun says, at the same time as the man in the commercial.

“Well…then I’ll tell you that mom actually called the other day and said that I should go to London since her husband has some sort of fancy ass company and I could work there as a god knows what.” Sehun says and the room suddenly becomes quiet.

Baekhyun turns around to look at him and smiles, slapping him over the arm.

“You know I’ve never had a sugar daddy, right?”

“Everyone knew, you moron.” Baekhyun laughs.

“Should I take it?”

“What? The dick? Of course.”

“The job.” Sehun sighs, looking amused but also exasperated.

“No. You should keep living here with your daddy and younger brother who hates you with a passion and hang out with a 19 year old who doesn’t want to see his father who’s in a coma. Yes. Stay.” Baekhyun quickly says, looking from time to time at the other’s face, but then at his intertwined fingers.

“Wha-"Sehun mumbles, shifting in the seat.

"Watch the movie.” Baekhyun says, suddenly feeling sweating and uneasy.

In the end, Baekhyun doesn’t even know what the movie was about, but for some reason, when he thinks about Sehun going to work in London, he feels a pang of jealousy.

“I got to pee.” Sehun says, conveniently when they are in front of the rest room.

“Make it quick.” Baekhyun says, leaning on the wall.

The mall is more crowded than before, and even with all those people, he immediately spots Chanyeol, too tall, with his head visible from a mile (well, not really). It appears that the man sees him too, because he suddenly stops and looks right at him with surprise on his face. After a couple more seconds, he starts walking towards him, until they are standing face to face.

Baekhyun looks down at their feet and notices that the other’s are so much bigger than his.

_Of course they are, you moron. He probably also has a bigger dick and brain than you do_

When he finally looks up, just for a moment, it would be nice to say that their eyes lock and he feels lover surging through his veins. The only thing he feels right now is more guilt and disapproval from the other.

“You skipped class.” Chanyeol coldly says. “All of them, actually.” he continues with a frown.

He studies the boy’s features, his bloodshot eyes and dark circles underneath them, the sickly paleness of his skin and chapped, bitten lips. Then, his eyes go to his clothes, the blue hoodie covering the ones he gave him the other night. Too big, looking like two potato sacks on his small frame.

“And you look awful.” he sighs.

“Thank you. This is usually the look that I’m going for.” Baekhyun smirks, but it fades away quickly.

Chanyeol doesn’t leave his spot, only shakes his head and looks for another brief moment at the boy. The first thing that Baekhyun notices when he glances at the other is a rather small mark, right below his ear, all purple and green.

_A hickey_

As if the man felt the suddenly growing heartbeat of the one in front of him, his hand goes to cover the little spot, rubbing it, as if it would rub off just as easily (at least both of them hope so).

“Well. I feel fantastic. So I don’t know what you are talking about. My friend is drowning in the toilet, so I should go and save him from the toilet sharks.” Baekhyun says, turning around, but quickly, a hand grabs his wrist, pinning him into place.

“Baekhyun…I hate when you act like this. I want to help you.” Chanyeol says, his features softening.

“And maybe you should know that some people don’t need help. Or yours.” Baekhyun says, turning to look at him. “You keep saying this crap, on and on, but do you actually help me?! Do you fucking know what I need or do you just assume shit like everybody else?!”

“I’m-I’m trying to understand you-but you never let me-”

“You are my freaking math teacher. You are not my father. My father is in a coma right now. He should be the one to help me. Not you. I don’t want you to help me…I don’t.” Baekhyun says, feeling once again nauseous, as if the side effects of his hangover haven’t disappeared just yet.

But he also feels cold and warm at the same time, knowing that the other is still holding his wrist and that his heart is beating so fast.

“That what do you want me to do?!” the man asks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are well loved <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this chapter is a bit more interesting? Anyways, I finally have an idea about how I want to end this and Chanyeol's character is finally being pieced together in my head. But, all in all, I'm not extremely happy with the way this is turning out...Now I'm mostly excited about doing a Christmas special chapter, which might actually be the last one, or smth like this, just to end this on a fluffy note.
> 
> enjoy :)

Baekhyun plops down next to the door of the restroom, sighing and thinking that this is the least probable thing, in his list of improbable shit that could happen in his life, which is actually taking place. Skipping school (nothing new here), being hangover (also, old shit), having his father in a coma and refusing to even see him (that’s new) and almost having a fight with his math teacher, for whom he doesn’t know what he feels (also new).

The man looks at him for a moment, shifting from one foot to another, and then sits right next to him, his long legs taking too much space; he looks, considering only their size difference, like a father to him, not like a probable love interest.

Baekhyun turns his head to glance at him, and Chanyeol does too. They are standing close to each other, thighs almost touching that he can feel the warmth emanated by the skin; he can even smell the soft and fabric softener like fragrance he is always wearing. So close, that he can almost touch the other’s lips.

Chanyeol looks down and takes Baekhyun’s hand into his, weighting it with a smile.

“I-lied about liking being a teacher. I mean-I do enjoy it…but it’s not what I’d have loved to do. See myself being after years and years. But it’s safe.” he says, intertwining their fingers.

His feel callous next to Baekhyun’s, but the latter doesn’t mind and thinks that it feels nice. The only nice thing of the day.

“How bad do I stink?” he asks out of the blue, laughing at his own stupidity.

“Relatively bad…” the man laughs, looking at his face. “You are still wearing my clothes.” Chanyeol says, his voice suddenly becoming deeper and huskier.

“I didn’t go home…actually.”

“Last night…you left because-I know why you left, in fact.” the man lightly shakes his head, closing his eyes and smiling. “You met Rosé…this is embarrassing. A teacher is not supposed to have dirty thoughts about his student. And act as I do…it’s embarrassing…”

Baekhyun stays silent, breaking his hand apart from the man’s, feeling the blood angrily rush to his cheeks and ears as he bites the inside of his lips.

“So you find it-what-embarrassing that you like me?! Am I such a-I suppose I am, right? I’m embarrassing you all the time. The fucking perfect Mr. Park with his perfect life, always caring about the others, with no mistake. And here is the mistake.” Baekhyun says, pointing at himself. He quickly stands up, feeling dizzy as he does so, a couple of people turn around to give them a glance, but he couldn’t care less in this moment.

“I didn’t mean it in that way…you are just so young and it doesn’t feel right. I’m not a-”

“Yeah, I get it. You caring about me is also just a mask. Free tuition and crap, free counselling and the only thing you think about is how to stick it in me without feeling embarrassed or guilty about it.” he says, spitting out the words in a thin, strangled voice.

Chanyeol finally stands up too, and being so close to the boy, he is hovering over the other’s small frame.

“It is not…I just can’t-I’m not even-” Chanyeol trails but Baekhyun closes the remaining distance between them and on his tip toes, kisses him. There’s no explosion behind closed eyelids, but he feels the other’s arms wrap around his body, pressing him to his chest, and it is warm and safe. He doesn’t even know why he did it, when he least expected it.

It doesn’t last as long as he would have wished because soon after, Chanyeol pulls back, but keeps his hands as they are. To his surprise, the man is the one to kiss him once more, softly and slowly, without hurrying, and he tries to ignore everything around him, even the couple of people who shout at them to get a room.

“You have a girlfriend.” is what Baekhyun blubbers out when the kiss ends, noticing for the second time the small, purple and green mark on his neck.

“Baek…”

The boy looks behind the man and remembers that he was supposed to wait for Sehun to get out of the bathroom. Sehun who is so casually walking to the exit doors of the shopping center, without even saying him “goodbye”.

“Hey, Baek…this is…new to me, alright? I-I’ve never done anything like this, and I already feel like I’m screwing it up.” Chanyeol says, looking down at Baekhyun’s face.

The boy really wants to believe that the other is honest, but there’s this tiny and annoying thought hammering at the back of his mind.

_He has a girlfriend…he is older…he’s only fooling around with you…he has a girfriend_

The man smiles, but Baekhyun thinks he feels nauseous and positively sweaty and red all over. Especially when Chanyeol gives him another peck on the lips.

“This is not okay…“ Baekhyun whispers, taking a step back. "Last night you pushed me away, but today what’s different?” he asks, being at a safe distance from the other.

“I don’t know. I haven’t been in love with Rosé for so long. You make me feel-”

“Then break up with her, for fuck’s sake. I can’t be just your fucking toy, to in the end have you go back to her like nothing ever happened.” Baekhyun says, as his heartbeat is accelerating, feeling the anger pulsing through his veins. “If I actually make you feel in some sort of way…”

All he can see now is his father, in the day he hit him, the last day he saw him, when he truly left them for someone else. The day he wished that he were dead.

“I can’t be that person.” Baekhyun shakes his head, and with that, runs out of the mall, hoping to still find Sehun in the bus stop.

To his luck, the other is still waiting on a bench, surrounded by some doves, just like a more masculine Cinderella.

“You left without me.” Baekhyun says.

“I didn’t mean to interrupt. Are you okay?”

“Why everybody keeps asking me that?!!” he says.

“Cause you look like crap?” Sehun raises an eyebrow. “I’m going to take the job. It’s London, right? Jongdae will finally be proud of me.”

“I guess so…” he sighs. He lets his head fall back on the plastic behind him and look up at the already clouded sky.

“You know…he seems to care about you, if that’s what you are-you know…” Sehun says, looking at the other.

“Whatever…” Baekhyun mumbles.

The ride back is rather quiet, both of them listening to music from Baekhyun’s phone, with a headphone in one ear. And he would lie if he didn’t say that he is rather anxious and scared to go home, where he might find his mother. And he indeed almost bumps into her at the entrance, right when she opens the door.

“Where have you been?” she asks with a sigh.

Her eyes have bags underneath them, being red and irritated as if she just cried.

“At the mall. With Sehun.” he says, trying to walk inside, but the woman doesn’t make any space for him to pass through.

“It’s almost 2pm, Baekhyun!! What are you intending to do with your life?! Your grades are bad, your behavior even worse, you don’t even sleep at home as of late…” she shouts, angrily gesticulating. “You are hangover…”

“I’m going to my room.” Baekhyun flatly says.

“No.” the woman says, suddenly almost towering over the boy, even though Baekhyun is a couple centimeters taller than her.

Everything reminds him of the times when he was little, just as stubborn, but almost scared of the person in front of him. Now, the fear is coming back in small shots.

“You are still living underneath my roof, so you’ll do as I say. You are coming with me to the hospital and from tomorrow you’ll start looking for a job. I don’t care what. Even as a street cleaner, but from now on, if you won’t go to school, you’ll go to work.” she says, pushing him forward and Baekhyun finds himself incapable of saying another word or opposing to anything said.

He gets into the old Ford, right next to his mother and keeps quiet for the entire ride, everything downing over him. He hits his head on the headrest, huffing and kicking with his foot.

The woman only glances at him from time to time, but doesn’t say anything, only her fingers grip a little tighter the steering wheel. With a loud creak, the car stops in front of the hospital, but Baekhyun doesn’t get out, not even when his mother is standing in front of his window.

“Now, Baekhyun.” she says, knocking into the glass.

He finally follows her inside, and the hospital seems the same as in the morning, only now he doesn’t know how he feels. Maybe only like crap.

The room is right on his left, but he waits for the woman to open it and get in first. On the hospital bed, his father is lying with an oxygen mask on his face. His eyes are closed, and half of his face is covered in bandages as a couple of tubes are coming out of his arms, connected to some machines.

“Where’s his-you know…girlfriend?” he asks, coming closer to the bed with shy steps. He is shaking and suddenly feeling cold.

“She died…they couldn’t do anything to save her…” she says, sitting down on a chair next to the window.

“Ohh…”

He walks closer to the bed, touching the sheets with his trembling fingers. The man’ chest is slowly rising and falling and when Baekhyun puts his hand over the other’s, it is cold.

“I can leave you…if you want.”

“No, please, don’t.” Baekhyun quickly says, glancing at his mother. “Hey…dad.” he whispers. Pausing, he looks around the room, at the couple of vases filled with flowers and deflated balloons scattered around and it seems like their brightness only makes the place look darker. He gulps down, his tongue feeling thick and heavy in his mouth as his fingers clammy. “I-I-I never really wanted you to die. I don’t, actually. Can you live? Please…?” he says, squeezing for a couple of seconds the other hand that looks so cold and dead.

But there comes no answer from the other, and even though he knows that, he still feels disappointed and guilty seeing his father lying still in front of him.

_Maybe it’s all my fault…_

Only looking at him, in his hospital room, does he feel utterly ashamed of his thoughts and wish.

They don’t linger for any longer at the hospital, but on the way back home, Baekhyun finds the courage to speak, something he has found so easy to do only a couple of days ago. Now he cannot even gather his thoughts.

“I want to drop out. Out of high school.” he says, staring out of the window.

Immediately, the car stops and his body is being pushed forward.

“What on Earth are you talking about?!” his mother asks.

“I hate school. I don’t want to go to university and become some big shit. It’s not for me. I just-”

“And do you think that dropping out will do you good?! Huh?! Since when do you know what’s better for yourself? Do you always want me to stay up late at night and worry about you?” his mother shouts, staring at him with big, red eyes.

He cannot hold her gaze, so he looks down, at his too big sweat pants.

“Answer me, Baekhyun.”

“What do you want me to say?” he asks in a thin, frail voice.

“Nothing. But don’t you dare drop out. You will finish high school and then you can do whatever you want with your life. But until then, don’t you dare Baekhyun…don’t you…” she says, her voice shaking as her body.

The woman hits the steering wheel with a clenched fist, her shoulders trembling and then, Baekhyun notices the small tear that falls down onto her shirt. He rapidly looks away, out of the window, feeling his heart and chest hurt with god knows what.

It’s quiet and he doesn’t even know when the engine starts and the car stops once again, in front of their house.

“I’m going to pick Lucy from school. You-you…” she trails off, but leaves, without giving him a second glance.

Baekhyun thought that voicing out his desire for the past couple of months to his mother would make him feel better, even free, but only more guilt and frustration doom on him.

He sits down on the couch and fidgets with the phone, feeling unsure. Finally, he presses dial and after the second ring tone, the other picks up.

“Soo…can you come over? I have a feeling that I’m grounded and I feel like crap. And I really need you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❤❤❤❤


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter than usual, but it needed to be this quicky (also because I was too lazy). Anyways, I'm starting to feel this story once again, especially because I have a clear ending in my mind and the character of Chanyeol is finally taking shape, and in the end you'll see what I'm talking about. I think the 13th chapter will definetly be the fluffy Christmas one.  
> Forgot to add that the song for this chapter is [ EXO-Going Crazy ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVtyhucMqZg)
> 
> enjoy:)

“Kyungsoo…” Baekhyun whines, attempting to grab the pillow from the other’s hands, but even though they are the same size, he doesn’t seem to be able to recover it.

“I’ll throw it out of the window if you don’t stop.” Kyungsoo says, frowning, and tosses it into a corner with quite some force. The material crackles and a couple of feathers start flying through the air.

“Ouch. I thought I was the angry one.” the boy says, plopping himself on his belly onto the bed, placing his chin on the palms of his hand; his feet are lazily dangling in the air. “What’s your problem?”

“Nothing.” Kyungsoo says, walking over to take the pillow and put it back on the chair in the shape of a green hand.

“That’s what you always say…” he puffs, letting himself fall a little forward, until his hands touch the floor. At least, this way he doesn’t see the crack on the ceiling. “Should I work at Subway? Or maybe at McDonald’s? That’s the official poor student’s job.”

“You are an idiot. A big, big one, actually.” Kyungsoo says, still standing on his feet right in front of the other.

“You seem constipated.” he comes to his original position. “And I’m not. High school is useless for me.” Baekhyun smirks, throwing just another pillow at his friend.

“Would you just stop it?!” Kyugsoo mutters between clenched teeth, tossing this pillow at his feet with enough force to make it jump a couple of centimeters into the air. “Is anything important to you, really? Because it doesn’t seem so.” he continues, putting this one on the same green chair (another one of Baekhyun’s wishes for his birthday, which in the end Kyungsoo and Sehun granted).

“Of course there are some…important things to me…” Baekhyun smiles, sitting up.

“Sure.”

“I care about you. And mom. And Lucy. And dad.” he says, stepping closer to the other. Kyungsoo’s breathing hitches a little, his chest rising and falling rapidly, but he keeps still, even though he is too close to Baekhyun for his own mental and physical comfort.

Baekhyun grabs him by the back of his neck, carefully looking at his slightly parted lips, trying to imagine himself kissing his best friend once again, but the only thing that floods his mind is the memory of Chanyeol’s lips onto his; so soft and warm and wrong. Standing like this for a while, Kyungsoo doesn’t move, but only looks down from time to time, feeling his heart breaking the ribcage.

Finally, Baekhyun drags him into a tight embrace and Kyungsoo immediately pushes him away.

“I’m not Sehun, so fuck off.” he says, angrier than he intended to sound.

“Fiiine.” Baekhyun pouts.

“It’s not working.” Kyungsoo sighs.

“Well-today I’ve-” but the words die on Baekhyun’s tongue, because he realizes he just cannot tell the other that he has just kissed Chanyeol, only a couple of hours ago. He has always shared with him everything he has had on his mind, embarrassing or not, but not this time. This time it feels different

“I’m going. See you at school.” Kyungsoo says and for the first time, Baekhyun doesn’t try to make him stay for longer.

He simply lets Kyungsoo leave home, after barely an hour.

When he goes to sleep, closing his eyes, he feels totally and utterly guilty and at fault, uncomfortable in his own skin. Almost as if he was about to lose somebody or something.

But in the morning, those concerns are being erased and Baekhyun doesn’t really know why he has been so worried about before.

_Everything will be fine. Kyungsoo is still my best friend and dad must wake up from his coma_

It’s Thursday and unfortunately, Baekhyun has to go to school and face his reality that Chanyeol is. To his surprise, the man acts the same as usual during class, as if nothing had happened between them, but for some strange reason, he cannot contain his flustering heart. Even from the last row he feels like he is standing too close to him.

“Baekhyun.” Chanyeol says when the boy is passing by his desk, to leave the classroom at the break. Kyungsoo is right at the door, looking for a couple of seconds at him before he leaves the room. The boy is all alone with Chanyeol.

“Are you busy after school?” the man asks.

“What a good joke. Of course I’m busy with all the homework I have to do.” Baekhyun says with a serious mine on his face. But he finally bursts out in laughter when he realizes that Chanyeol might have actually believed him.

“We could go and eat something.” Chanyeol coughs, looking down at his fingers.

“Like a date?” Baekhyun smirks.

“To talk? I know that you are mad, but I’m really trying to let you see that…you don’t embarrass me.“ he says, glancing at him and smiles.

"You know it’s not only that…” Baekhyun trails off, staring at the small hickey on his neck.

Chanyeol rubs the spot once again and sighs.

“I broke up…with her. Last night. I-I want to prove to you that-you know-I really care about you.” Chanyeol says, shuffling from one foot to another.

Baekhyun’s smile becomes even wider and it takes him all his power not to jump into the other’s arms.

“Then I’m free after school.” Baekhyun says, giggling.

“Good.”

And Baekhyun cannot think or see anything else for the entirety of the day, quietly laughing and smiling out of the blue, even when he knows that Kyungsoo is looking at him with a strange glint in his eyes. But he cannot seem to find the power to care, when things seem to be unwinding so perfectly for him.

“So, my father bought me a freaking console and some games from his freaking trip as a…I’m not sure what.” Jongdae rubs his arms, kicking a rock. “Anyways, you coming?”

“I’m grounded.” Baekhyun says, chewing on some pink bubblegum.

“When did this stop you from hanging out with us?” Jongdae laughs.

“It’s complicated.” Baekhyun says, seeing Kyungsoo from the corner of his eye, but his friend keeps on walking without looking back at him. As if he didn’t even noticed him.

“Well…then don’t forgot to come on Sunday to the train station. It’s Sehun after all.” Jongdae says, kicking another stone as his hands are in the pockets of his jeans.

“That I won’t.” Baekhyun laughs and finally, runs into the bus that gets him home. But after the first stop, he quickly gets out as a black car is waiting for him near a turn of the road, just underneath a big tree.

“Sorry. I had to talk to someone.” Baekhyun says to Chanyeol.

“It’s okay. Where do you want to eat?” he asks as he starts the engine of the car. 

“Wherever.”

“Then I’ll bring you to my favorite place.” he smiles, patting his hand.

“Sounds good to me.”

He isn’t certain if this what falling in love means, feeling giddy and filled with joy only thinking about the other, just imagining Chanyeol kissing him more and making him feel dizzy.

“Earth to Baekhyun.” Chanyeol laughs, waving his fingers before Baekhyun’s eyes. “We are here.”

They get out of the car and to his little surprise, the restaurant is once again a Chinese one, only fancier. Chanyeol actually opens the door for him with a shy smile and Baekhyun’s heart flutters as he walks in.

“We could eat here or…I have another idea.” Chanyeol says and obviously, the boy goes for the second option.

They actually stop out of the city, near the small forest that is only a couple of miles long. It’s quiet as no cars are passing on the rather remote road, and even though it’s still early, the sky is clouded and dark, casting deep shadows on the land.

“Are we going to eat in the car?” Baekhyun asks, laughing.

“I have some sort of blanket in the back. We could eat on the grass.” Chanyeol says, getting out of the car. Baekhyun follows him outside, watching him open the trunk and retrieve a big, green cover.

He lays on the grass behind some shrubs, so they are concealed from any cars that might pass by and thinks that for a first date that isn’t after all a date, things couldn’t have turned out better. Especially when the other is wearing a slightly too tight shirt that highlights all the muscles in his body.

“This is nice.” Baekhyun says, lying down with the back on the blanket, staring at the grey clouds that keep moving and shifting into different shapes. He’s almost tempted to say that he saw a small heart somewhere.

“Sorry. It sounded better in my mind.” Chanyeol laughs.

He puts the boxes with food in front of Baekhyun and sits right next to him.

“I like it.” Baekhyun says, leaning on the other’s shoulder. He looks up at him and Chanyeol lowers down until their faces are only centimeters apart. Giggling, Baekhyun tangles one of his hands into the man’s blue shirt, dragging him even closer until their lips touch and he feels the sting of electricity running through him.

He pecks at the other’s bottom lip and then at his top one, still laughing with much happiness in his chest, but after a while, Chanyeol takes control and slowly pushes him back onto the ground.

Running his fingers through his hair, Baekhyun lets out a small whimper, one that he would do when Kyungsoo doesn’t want to do as he wishes, and it is the man’s turn to let out a laugh.

“The food will get cold.” Chanyeol says, standing up to fix his shirt.

“Okay…” Baekhyun smiles.

“You are adorable.” he says, brushing Baekhyun’s stray hairs from the forehead. The younger fumbles with the hem of his hoodie, looking down as a light blush is creeping to his cheeks.

Chanyeol leans down once again and gives him another peck on the lips before he steals one of the boxes with food from before Baekhyun.

“I’ll eat it all if you don’t hurry.” Chanyeol smiles and the boy smiles too, feeling suddenly so happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❤❤❤❤


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy :)

Baekhyun shifts from one foot to another, rubbing his arms vigorously over his body as his teeth are chattering in his mouth.

“I’m dying here from hypothermia.” he whines, now jumping from one foot to another in random circle patterns.

“It’s not our fault that you are an idiot.” Kyungsoo says, giving him a colder look than the weather itself.

“How would I know that it would suddenly be only 5 degrees outside?” he asks, coming closer to a quiet Sehun, who finally wraps an arm around him.

“I’m giving up.” Kyungsoo mumbles.

“Only Sehun loves me.” he says, leaning on the other with a pleased smile on his face.

“The train is coming.” Jongdae almost jumps in surprise (and annoyance), looking at his brother.

“Ohh…”

Sehun let’s go of Baekhyun and picks up at the black suitcase from the ground, gulping down with difficulty.

“It’s only London, you big baby.” his brother says, trying to smile as he himself shifts from one foot to another.

“Yeah…of course. Only London.” Sehun says, forcing a grin, but in the exact same moment, Jongdae practically hugs him to death, wrapping himself around the other like an oversized koala bear.

Just as quickly, Jongdae steps back and coughs, looking down at his shoes.

“Call from time to time, alright?”

Baekhyun does almost the same thing, only that the grip is less deathly, but trembling and cold, like a frozen chicken.

Kyungsoo chooses to only shake his hand and smile, something he hasn’t done in some time, or at least not in front of Baekhyun.

The train stops right in front of them and Baekhyun likes to imagine that this is a scene from Harry Potter, when all of them are going to Hogwarts. But it’s only Sehun, managing to drop the luggage on the platform just as the train starts going and Jongdae has to throw the suitcase in his arms with a Hulk-like strength.

“You moroooon!” he yells, receiving a couple of strange glances from the people around him.

“I’m hungry. And freezing.” Baekhyun says. “Is anyone listening to me today!?” he asks, since Jongdae is still looking after the train and Kyungsoo acts as if he didn’t exist one meter away from him.

“Let’s go eat.” Kyungsoo says, grabbing Jongdae by the elbow to make him move from the spot he has been glued to.

“You’ll face time him.” Baekhyun says between chattering teeth.

“I’ll live practically by myself.” Jongdae says, walking with his head down.

Baekhyun does feel rather rapidly that something is missing, other than Kyungsoo’s words and Jongdae’s spiritual presence. But right when they enter the restaurant (or better, fast-food) his phone buzzes in his pocket. A message from Chanyeol, which doesn’t say much, but nonetheless, Baekhyun starts smiling like a fool, reading it.

“Earth to an idiot. What do you want to eat?” Kyungsoo says with annoyance.

“Uhmm…what you guys order.” he says, happily texting the other back.

Jongdae gives him a rather amused look, but Kyungsoo doesn’t seem to pay any more attention to the two of them, choosing to focus on the menu in front of him.

He finally sends the (only a couple of) messages and regains some sort of control of other organs and functions that do not include his heart (or second heart positioned somewhere lower on his body).

Kyungsoo pushes the tray into his arms without much care and Baekhyun almost spills the noodle soup all over himself.

“The two of you are mental.”

“No, we are not.” they both say at the same time and glance for a moment at each other.

“Yeah…if you say so.” Jongdae mumbles, picking up his own tray.

They sit at a table in the far back, with four chairs and all three of them think that somebody is missing. Baekhyun receives just another message, which makes him jump in surprise and look at the other two before actually unlocking the phone.

“Are you some sort of secret agent or what?” Jongdae asks, with a mouth full.

“Totally.” Baekhyun mumbles with a smile.

“For fuck’s sake!” Kyungsoo grumbles, taking (with force and anger) the phone from the other’s hands, throwing it on the table. “It stays there until we finish eating.”

“What? It’s urgent! My mother could call and-”

“No.” Kyungsoo says, placing his phone on top and quickly after, Jongdae does the same.

So they eat in silence, Baekhyun as fast as he can since he wasn’t able to send the last message. He tries not to stare at the phone the entire time, but from the look on Kyungsoo’s face, the most probable thing is that he hasn’t succeeded.

“Just take it already!” Kyungsoo snaps, sliding the phone over to where Baekhyun is sitting.

“Somebody has a stick up his ass today. And every day. But today is worse.” Jongdae laughs, looking from Baekhyun to Kyungsoo with an all knowing smile.

“And you have a stick instead of a brain.” he says, huffing.

Baekhyun finally manages to send the message without which he cannot take another breath of air and sighs in relief.

“Is like Sehun leaving just made the two of you weirder than usual. Honestly, just-ugh!” Jongdae says, standing up and wondering what sorcery has happened in the last couple of days to both of his friends.

Baekhyun’s head falls on the table, laughing uncontrollably as the other two are staring at him (as well as the rest of the restaurant). Kyungsoo gives him a slap over the neck and Baekhyun laughs even harder. The other shyly smiles at first (followed by Jongdae), but ultimately, the three of them burst out in a loud laughter than covers every other noise in the restaurant.

Kyungsoo pinches a little his nape and Baekhyun gives him a bear hug that it’s completed by Jongdae. Finally, the three of them feel a bit more at peace, or more certain that everything might actually be alright between them.

“You are killing me.” Kyungsoo says and Baekhyun smiles before he lets him go.

“I miss Sehun.” Jongdae mumbles, still attached to the other.

“There is only one month till Christmas.” Kyungsoo says.

“I guess…”

So, they finally head home, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo going on the same way, in total awkward silence, even though the hug might have seemed that it cleared out some bad air that was lingering between.

“Sooo…are you still grounded?” Kyungsoo asks, not even looking at Baekhyun.

He shakes his head, smiling.

“We have peace…finally. Dad actually woke up from his coma yesterday and I promised mom that I will finish high school. So…we are okay.” Baekhyun says.

“I’m glad.”

Baekhyun stops in the middle of the sidewalk, and looks straight at Kyungsoo’s back who keeps walking until he realizes the other is not next to him anymore. He turns around, with a questioning look onto his face.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m with Mr. Park. I really needed to tell someone. Tell you. I’m with him. We kissed, actually.” he quickly says, looking down.

“Oh…” is all that Kyungsoo says.

“That’s it?” Baekhyun tries to smile, feeling guilty and frustrated once again.

“I don’t know…” Kyungsoo shrugs, looking defeated and sad for the first time, not hiding underneath his apparent indifference.

“Oh…”

“I should probably get inside…it’s cold…and you are freezing.” Kyungsoo says, smiling weakly at the other.

“Are you okay? You don’t seem-”

“I’m great. Just cold.” he says and eventually waves Baekhyun goodbye and enters his house, his shoulder hunched back and a sigh escaping his lips the moment the door closes after him.

Baekhyun stays still for a moment, before he begins walking once again, but not to his house, but towards the black car that stopped some meters away, underneath an old tree. Opening the door, he suddenly smiles and considers that he can think about Kyungsoo’s strange behavior later. Or simply think about anything sometime, but not right now.

“Hey…” Chanyeol greets him.

“Hey…”

“You are freezing.” the man says, starting up the heat inside the car. “Why are you always cold and not well dressed when I see you?” he asks, laughing.

“So you can hug me?” Baekhyun says, grinning.

And Chanyeol does so, even though it is a little uncomfortable, considering the distance between the seats and the steering wheel, but the boy is pleased nonetheless.

When they finally break apart, Baekhyun looks up at his face and slowly, with his eyes fluttering shut, he kisses him on the lips.

Now, he thinks, he can do it without feeling guilty anymore.

“Baek?” Chanyeol laughs, looking at Baekhyun.

“Huh?”

“Have you just dozed off kissing me?”

Baekhyun feels blood rushing to his cheeks in embarrassment, realizing that more than probably, he is not what the elder expected when he somehow accepted to be in a relationship with him.

“Sorry…”

“For what?” Chanyeol laughs, brushing his fingers through Baekhyun’s hair and pushing him closer to his body. “You are adorable…” he says and kisses him once more, softly.

“I don’t want to be adorable.” the boy pouts at him. “And this is getting uncomfortable.” he laughs.

Chanyeol only kisses him one more time as a response and Baekhyun sighs, feeling once again on cloud nine.

“Can we-you know-go to your apartment?” Baekhyun asks, looking down.

Chanyeol’s hand falls next to his body, and for a moment, it’s silent.

“Look…Baek. Rosé hasn’t moved out yet and I couldn’t throw her on the streets…” Chanyeol says.

“Oh…”

“I’m sleeping on the couch. I promise there’s nothing left between us.” he says, kissing Baekhyun’s forehead. “Do you trust me?”

The boy looks up and for some seconds, he isn’t certain what his answer is.

“Yes…I do.” he says, wondering if he really believes his words. If he truly believes Chanyeol.

But the other kisses him once more, melting away all worries that might have clouded his mind.

“Yes…”

��

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be quite honest, I can't wait to finish this series. I don't really like how it turned out, or the fact that it kept on dragging and dragging. It seems like if I pass the 8 chapter mark, my interest in a fic just flops, which is rather unfortunate, but the only problem is that in the meantime I get more interesting ideas that I want to scribble down, but I cannot since I have to finish the current piece. I am rather stubborn with this one and I do want to complete it, since I don't like leaving things unfinished, but my excitement is just below the sea level.   
> So...rant over.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter, whaat?  
> This one has actually wrote itself and I haven't honestly enjoyed writing for this fic as much as this time. I even think the whole feel for this is different. 
> 
> Anyways, I've listened to [ IU-Through the night ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzYnNdJhZQw) the entire time I wrote this. I suppose it fits the feel of this chapter.
> 
> enjoy :)

“Jongdae, you fucking moron, you’ve just spilled beer all over the fucking white carpet! We’ll have to pay for your crap!” Kyungsoo yells, throwing a slipper at Jongdae (and miserably missing, so he throws the second one, which finally hits him).

“Stop trying to kill me!” Jongdae shouts, picking the slippers and delivering them exactly in Kyungsoo’s face. “And I thought everything was included in the rent…” he sheepishly smiles.

“Your life is included in the rent. I’m not paying for anything.” the other says, leaving Jongdae all alone in the room, with the can of beer still on the floor.

“We could say that a raccoon broke in and pissed onto it!”

“Pissed on you!”

Baekhyun smiles from the kitchen, hearing the shouted conversation of the other two. Unfortunately for him, the knife he is holding slips on the cutting board and slightly cuts his finger.

“Crap!”

He takes a napkin and covers the cut with it, the red liquid bleeding through it immediately. Picking another and another one, he puts them on top of another, until he cannot see anything.

“Tell me that a raccoon didn’t piss here too.” Kyungsoo laughs, walking closer to the other.

“Hey, are you okay?” he asks, immediately taking Baekhyun’s hand into his, inspecting it with a worried expression on his face. “I’ll get some bandages.” he says, rapidly leaving the kitchen.

The boy sighs, finally removing the napkins, revealing a small cut that has actually stopped bleeding.

“Kyun-” he starts saying, but stops, suddenly feeling guilty and ashamed once again, like he has felt for the past couple of weeks.

Sighing, he throws the knife into the sink and stares at the potatoes he was attempting to slice.

“Give me your finger.” Kyungsoo says from behind him and Baekhyun turns around, almost surprised.

“Kyungsoo…it’s fine. It stopped.” Baekhyun says, but the other doesn’t listen to him, and wraps a patch around it, just after he gently puts some cream onto the cut.

“It might get infected otherwise. Don’t keep it for too long though, the humidity and germs…” Kyungsoo mumbles, putting everything on the table. “I’ll finish the potatoes.”

“Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun says, grabbing his wrist.

“You should help Jongdae clean the mess.” Kyungsoo says, grabbing a knife without even looking at Baekhyun.

“Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun whispers one more time, not letting go of his hand.

“What?” he asks, finally glancing at him.

“I’m sorry. For everything.” Baekhyun says, unable to make his voice feel steady and strong.

“What are you talking about? Why would you be sorry for?” Kyungsoo tries to smile, letting out a small laugh.

“Because I’m a freaking shitty friend? Because I never tried to-I didn’t want to know how you felt. Because I keep hurting you over and over and you are still here?” Baekhyun says and Kyungsoo tries to laugh once again, but he doesn’t manage to do so.

“You are being so melodramatic. Stop it before I puke. Really.” he smiles, going back to his potatoes. “You cut them all wrong.” he adds.

Baekhyun’s hand falls down next to his body and stays in the same spot for a couple more seconds, looking straight at Kyungsoo, who doesn’t pay any more attention to him.

Finally, he leaves the room and heads for the entrance hallway, where he quickly puts the coat and boots on him and opens the front door.

It is still snowing, lightly, but the small pathway that leads to their cabin is free of any snow. Sehun is somewhere in the distance, shoveling away the rest of it. He runs to him, his cheeks becoming rosy from the biting cold and enormous effort of running a couple a meters.

“I’m so proud of you.” he smiles, patting the other’s back.

“It told you I hit the gym in London.” Sehun says with a grin. “Weren’t you supposed to make fries?” he raises an eyebrow.

“I cut my finger and Kyungsoo was again…Kyungsoo…” Baekhyun sighs, throwing himself on a pile of snow.

“You’ll wet your ass.” Sehun laughs, but rapidly plops himself right next to the other.

“Is he still…in his little shell?” Sehun asks.

“Right there…”

“Have you thought that you should just leave him like this?” Sehun asks, looking at Baekhyun.

“Isn’t that…counterproductive or something?” Baekhyun asks, putting his chin on his knees that he hugs.

“Look…he obviously doesn’t want to talk about whatever you two need to talk about, so why don’t you just leave it as it is? Admit you screwed up and that you’re selfish and let him move on for fuck’s sake. And you too. Stop hanging on the whole Chanyeol ordeal.” Sehun says, harsher sounding than he has intended.

Maybe the month spent working in London has actually changed him in a way.

“Since when have you become the wise one? Baekhyun asks.

"I’m almost 23…”

“In 3 months.”

“Doesn’t matter.” Sehun laughs. “But really. Drop it.”

“And what if I can’t?” Baekhyun asks, squeezing his lips tightly together.

“Then stop being friends with Kyungsoo.” Sehun says, standing up. “You know it’s not going to work…between you two.”

“Sehun…” Baekhyun lets himself fall on the soft snow.

“It’s not. So make up your mind and stop torturing me with stupid questions. I’m not a love counselor. Or school counselor. Or a counselor. I’m a fucking half-secretary, okay?” he says, picking up the shovel once again and starting to gather up the rest of the snow.

“Fine.” Baekhyun huffs, standing up and running once again towards the cabin.

When Baekhyun has suggested renting a cabin for Christmas and New Year’s Eve, he has actually thought that a little bit of snow, some skiing and the confines of 4 walls would bring him and Kyungsoo back together. Make them the way they used to. It seems like instead that the proximity is only driving them apart.

He closes the door behind him, puts the coat back on the hanger and the boots somewhere on the floor and stops, unsure of what to do next. In the living room, Jongdae is actually trying (between curses) to clean the raccoon pee he created, and in the kitchen-well, in fact, Baekhyun doesn’t know what Kyungsoo is doing because he doesn’t have the courage to look. He simply goes upstairs to change his wet pants.

Sitting on his bed side table, there are his gifts for the others for Christmas, fortunately untouched by anybody. One of them is smaller than the other two, and Baekhyun smiles when he looks at it.

The sweats feel too big on his small frame, and when he glances down at them, he realizes that they are not his. Black and too long, threatening to fall off his hips. Chanyeol’s.

It might seem that in the rush of packing for the trip, he hasn’t noticed what he was really putting into his suitcase.

Rapidly, he throws them onto the floor, feeling contaminated. Just the way he has felt for the past couple of weeks every time he has dared to think about Chanyeol. About the short period of time when he thought he had him.

Just when he was felt so happy and unwilling to care about anyone and anybody else.

Baekhyun picks another pair of pants, this time his, and leaves the room, still unsure.

He walks into the kitchen, where Kyungsoo is just frying the potatoes and listening to music.

_And you singing the song thinking this is the life_

_And you wake up in the morning and your head feels twice the size_

He hears Kyungsoo singing along the lyrics of the song that they both now too well. It makes him feel a certain way, guilty and filled with melancholy, suddenly having the need to hug the other and feel him close to his body.

He does so, and Kyungsoo jumps in surprise, for a moment trying to push him aside, but quickly, resiliates.

“What’s up with you today?” Kyungsoo asks, patting Baekhyun’s hand.

“Nothing…just…nothing.” he whispers, breathing in deeply.

“You should call the other…my fries and steak are ready.” Kyungsoo says, but Baekhyun still doesn’t move.

He does so, eventually, exactly when the song stops playing.

The two of them rapidly set up the table in the living room, famished and impatient to finally eat.

“The stain is going nowhere.” Jongdae says out of the blue, when he sits next to Baekhyun.

“Because you are an idiot.” Kyungsok snaps.

Sehun gives Baekhyun an inquiring look from the other side of the table and the latter only smiles in response. He might be able to do like this after all, even though it’s not as perfect as he wanted everything to be. In the end, his Prince Charming only turned out to be a frog, so Baekhyun thinks that for the moment it as okay like this, the four of the still sticking together.

“Sehun, you moron, how the fuck did you manage to eat all the meat? Are you insane?!” Jongdae yells, slapping his brother over the hand.

Baekhyun glances at Kyungsoo, and Kyungsoo at him, and they both smile.

He thinks that maybe everything might be better than he has expected in the end. Because he doesn’t have to make a decision right now about anything. Still, he has half a year to think about everything, about what he might do after high school, about his parents who decided to not get a divorce after all, about him and Kyungsoo. Especially about Kyungsoo, who is smiling at him that sad and knowing smile.

He tries to stop his heart from aching, because he still doesn’t know if it’s guilt or something else.

“Heeey! Give my beer back!” Jongdae screams.

Maybe he has time.

“I honestly thought you two stopped acting like idiots.” Kyungsoo says.

Maybe.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song that Kyungsoo was singing was [ This is the life ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRYvuS9OxdA)
> 
> I thought that leaving it as an open ending is best suited for this fic, especially because it didn't turn out as I'd have liked.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and commenting on it, and I'm so sorry if it didn't turn out as you'd have liked. <3

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are well loved :)
> 
> quick edit: do you think the characters are somewhat well constructed? (I'm not totally happy with Chanyeol...)


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